What I’m Playing – Anniversary Coming

I wanted to post a quick update because I haven’t been doing a ton of reviews lately and I didn’t want people to think I’m slacking. I’m working on my 15th Anniversary feature, Classic Pinball Video Games: The Definitive Review. I knew I couldn’t top last year’s Konami Shoot ‘Em Ups feature. I wanted to do something that was all-encompassing of a specific type of game like Konami Shoot ‘Em Ups, and ultimately I landed on old school video pinball. Because of all my coverage of Pinball FX and Zaccaria, I get asked about games like Devil’s Crush, Space Cadet, and Sonic Spinball more than any other games. But, I never actually played all that much video pinball as a kid. I grew up with real tables and couldn’t deal with less than perfect physics.

So, over the last few months, I’ve played every video pinball game that I could get working. In a couple weeks, that feature will be posted, and it will have, not kidding, over 120 full reviews. I’m basically posting a book of video pinball reviews. If there’s a video pinball game you loved, chances are it’s included. This includes my first ever reviews for games on platforms like Sega Saturn, Amiga, 3DO, and CD-i. The only stuff mostly missing are Windows games, and I still will likely add a few more games before I hit publish. I’ve finished reviews for these games already:

• Video Pinball (Arcade)
• Solar War (Arcade – Unreleased)
• Thunderball! (Magnavox Odyssey²)
• Raster Blaster (Apple II)
• Video Pinball (Atari 2600)
• David’s Midnight Magic (Apple II)
• Night Mission (Apple II)
• Pinball Construction Set
• Bumper Bash (Atari 2600)
• Queen of Hearts (Apple II)
• Spinball (Vectrex)
• Pinball (Intellivision)
• Sega Flipper (Sega SG-1000)
• Rollerball (MSX)
• Vs. Pinball (Arcade)
• Pinball (NES)
• Pinbo (Arcade)
• Pinball Action (Arcade)
• Midnight Magic (Atari 2600)
• Panic Road (Arcade)
• Speed Ball (Arcade)
• Music Ball (Arcade – Unreleased)
• Time Scanner (Arcade)
• Fire Ball (MSX2)
• Moon Ball Magic (Famicom Disk System)
• Super Pinball (Famicom)
• Alien Crush (TurboGrafx-16/PC Engine)
• Rollerball (NES)
• Family Pinball (aka Rock ‘n Ball, Famicom/NES)
• Casino Games (Sega Master System)
• Revenge of the ‘Gator (Game Boy)
• Pinball Quest (NES)
• Hero Shūgō!! Pinball Party (Game Boy)
• Pin⋅Bot (NES)
• Devil’s Crush (TurboGrafx-16/PC Engine)
• Pinball (CD-i)
• Super Pinball Action (Arcade)
• Dino Land (Sega Genesis)
• High Speed (NES)
• Dragon’s Fury (Sega Genesis)
• Time Cruise (TurboGrafx-16)
• Pinball Dreams (Amiga)
• Pinball Jam (Atari Lynx)
• Crüe Ball (Sega Genesis)
• Jaki Crush (Super Famicom)
• Pinball Fantasies (Amiga CD32)
• Virtual Pinball (Sega Genesis)
• Dragon’s Revenge (Sega Genesis)
• Sonic Spinball (Sega Genesis)
• Kirby’s Pinball Land (Game Boy)
• Royal Flush (MS-DOS)
• Super Pinball: Behind the Mask (Super NES)
• Real Pinball (3DO)
• Pinball Dreams (Super NES)
• Sonic Spinball (Sega Game Gear & Master System)
• Wizard Pinball (Sega Game Gear)
• Grand Cross (Arcade)
• PaTaank! (3DO)
• Battle Pinball (3DO)
• Psycho Pinball (Sega Mega Drive)
• Pinball Dreams (Sega Game Gear)
• Pinball Illusions (Amiga CD)
• Thomas: The Tank Engine & Friends Pinball (Amiga)
• Pinball Mania (Amiga)
• Battle Pinball (Super Famicom)
• Super Pinball II: The Amazing Odyssey (Super Famicom)
• Kyūtenkai: Fantastic Pinball (PlayStation/Sega Saturn)
• Obsession (Amiga)
• Galactic Pinball (Virtual Boy)
• Space Pinball (Virtual Boy – Unreleased)
• Full Tilt! Pinball (Windows)
• Getaway: High Speed II (Super Game Boy)
• Ruiner Pinball (Atari Jaguar)
• Pinball Hazard (Amiga)
• Pinball Prelude (Amiga CD32)
• Slam Tilt (Amiga)
• Extreme Pinball (PlayStation)
• True Pinball (PlayStation)
• Pinball Graffiti (Sega Saturn)
• Pro Pinball: The Web (PlayStation)
• Power Rangers Zeo: Full Tilt Battle Pinball (PlayStation)
• Digital Pinball: Necronomicon (Sega Saturn)
• Hyper 3D Pinball (PlayStation) aka Tilt!
• Digital Pinball: Last Gladiators Version. 9.7 (Sega Saturn)
• Dragon Beat: Legend of Pinball (PlayStation)
• Pro Pinball: Timeshock! (PlayStation)
• ParanoiaScape (PlayStation)
• Hollywood Pinball (Game Boy Color)
• Pokémon Pinball (Game Boy Color)
• Power Pinball (PlayStation) aka Golden Logres
• Neo Golden Logres (Dreamcast)
• The Pinball (PlayStation) aka Simple 1500 Series Vol. 11: The Pinball
• Worms Pinball (PlayStation)
• Pro Pinball: Big Race USA (PlayStation)
• Pinball (PlayStation 2)
• Little Mermaid II: Pinball Frenzy (Game Boy Color)
• Pro Pinball: Fantastic Journey (PlayStation)
• 3D Ultra Pinball – Thrillride (Game Boy Color)

I still have these games left to play and review:

• Super Robot Pinball (Game Boy Color)
• KISS Pinball (PlayStation)
• Microsoft Pinball Arcade (Game Boy Color)
• Akira: Psycho Ball (PlayStation 2)
• Elemental Pinball (PlayStation)
• Muppet Pinball Mayhem (Game Boy Advance)
• The Pinball of the Dead (Game Boy Advance)
• Pinball Challenge Deluxe (Game Boy Advance)
• Pinball Advance (Game Boy Advance)
• Austin Powers Pinball (PlayStation)
• Pinball Tycoon (Game Boy Advance)
• Patriotic Pinball (PlayStation)
• Sonic Pinball Party (Game Boy Advance)
• Pokémon Pinball: Ruby & Sapphire (Game Boy Advance)
• Flipnic: Ultimate Pinball (PlayStation 2)
• Mario Pinball Land (Game Boy Advance) aka Super Mario Ball
• Pac-Man Pinball Advance (Game Boy Advance)
• Pinball (PlayStation Portable)
• Metroid Prime Pinball (Nintendo DS)
• Ottifanten Pinball (Game Boy Advance)
• Odama (Nintendo GameCube)
• Alien Crush Returns (WiiWare)
• Baby Pac-Man (Atari 7800)
• Demon Tilt (Modern Platforms)

The feature also has a bonus section of the games I deleted from the feature. Mostly “same game, different platform” situations where I didn’t put enough time into the game to actually do a fair review. I likely will be adding even more games as I check off the stuff I missed. And yes, Space Cadet is there. It’s called “Full Tilt! Pinball.” After the reviews are finished, every game will be ranked. Which game will stand tall as the greatest classic video pinball of all-time? Right now, Pro Pinball: Timeshock is looking pretty good. Plus some games that are questionably pinball, like ParanoiaScape, seen below, will count for the rankings.

I went back and forth on whether it and PaTaank for the 3DO should count as pinball games. If they had come in first or last in the rankings, maybe it would have mattered, but neither did. However, there are ten games so bad that I honestly have to put them in the discussion of the worst video game ever made, for any genre. When video pinball goes bad, it goes really bad. PaTaank for 3DO, seen below, is one of those ten games. Neat idea, atrocious execution.

As soon as this project is done, I will go back to playing a variety of games. Some stuff I have my eye on reviewing are Super Mario Galaxy 1 & 2, Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past, and the Switch 2 DLC for Mario Wonder. And if there’s ANY missing games on the above list that aren’t for Windows (which are stunningly hard to get working without being glitchy as all hell) let me know. Games like ParanoiaScape didn’t show up in searches for video pinball games. Had I not gotten a reader suggestion for it, I would have missed it for sure. I’m intending to do a C64 game called Mechanicus and a few older classic computer pins. They’re just not on the list yet. I also don’t know if anyone has made indie video pins games for old platforms (“homebrews” though I hate that term). I have one, Baby Pac-Man, which I’ve reviewed once before, but if there’s homebrew NES, Atari, Genesis, etc video pins, I would gladly add them. And yes, I will finally review Demon Tilt as the cap to the feature. The reason I’m not doing the sequel is because I like the nice, round number. The arcade Video Pinball came out in 1979 and Demon Tilt came out in 2019. So this feature covers forty years of video pinball evolution in the sequential order of its release. I really hope everyone enjoys it in early July! Back to work!

“What do you mean you don’t want a Gold/Silver version of Pokémon Pinball? WE ALREADY FINISHED IT! What would you have us do? Replace the Pokémon with generic robots? (puts down phone) They said they don’t care what we do with it, but it can’t be based on Pokémon Gold/Silver. Actually they told me to shove it up my ass but I think they were being metaphorical. How do I know? It won’t fit!”