Kid Icarus: Of Myths and Monsters Platform: Game Boy First Released November, 1991 Designed by Masafumi Sakashita Developed by Nintendo and Tose Co., Ltd UPDATE: Now Available with Switch Online Subscription (Standard)
Déjà vu.
Alright, let’s make this one go quickly. I’m not really THAT interested in the sequel to Kid Icarus. I’m only doing this because of a niggling little voice in my head asking how the f*ck Kid Icarus as a gaming franchise was in the same boat as Metroid to the point that they were basically identical twins for the first, oh, eight years of their existence. I know that’s stating the obvious, but when you lay out the comparisons, it’s actually jaw-dropping.
Both released in the United States in the Summer of 1987.
Nintendo opted to convert the save systems of the Famicom Disk System versions to a new password back-up system even though they had perfected the battery-backup format for Legend of Zelda (arguably their triplet since it was an FDS game released in 1986 which also debuted in the US in the Summer of 1987, but it had a different development team).
And both went on to get underwhelming Game Boy sequels made by literally the same lead designer, Masafumi Sakashita that fixed some problems but ended up much more bland than the original, as if they were afraid to experiment too much.
Kiss the memorable enemy sprites of the first game good bye. Myths’ enemy sprites suck. These things look like malicious portable electric fans.
It’s like the Kennedy/Lincoln comparison of Nintendo, only, you know, real. But Metroid went on to be one of the biggest franchises in Nintendo’s lineup while Kid Icarus apparently wandered off into the woods, never to be seen again. Oh, they say it had a game on 3DS but if it had basically no gameplay connection to Kid Icarus, is it really a sequel to Kid Icarus or a completely new game that just uses the name that was suddenly relevant again because Pit was in Super Smash Bros. You know, the famous fighting game franchise directed by the guy who did the Kid Icarus revival? I don’t really care if the 3DS game is good or not (I couldn’t play it without risking a live reenactment of the stoner film Idle Hands) because the actual Kid Icarus is just gone, like StarTropics, Wave Race, or Gyromite or modern stuff like Chibi Robo or Nintendogs. If I had to guess why, I’d say maybe Nintendo just realized Kid Icarus was never that good.
I thought the bosses of Kid Icarus were lame, but I’ll take them over these bosses that are so spongy and repetitive that all five boss battles become boring.
Kid Icarus on Game Boy is a much closer remake of the original than Return of Samus was for Metroid. If there was anything to salvage from Kid Icarus, this was the chance. And there are some improvements. There’s no falling deaths in this game, it controls MUCH better, and there’s also a much greater emphasis on exploration. The hammers that were only good for freeing NPCs to help you fight bosses now can uncover hidden doors. That’s a great idea. Zelda is basically based around how awesome hidden doors are. Well, except the stuff you uncover in Zelda helps you, and some of it is even essential to finishing the game. That’s not true of Kid Icarus GB, where I’m not sure I found a single hidden room that was actually worth seeking out.
The only hidden items of substance are keys that allow you to go back to already-visited rooms. This is another idea that should have been killed on the drawing board. Nearly every major risk/reward factor of the original game didn’t carry-over to the sequel. This isn’t specifically why the game died a miserable death, but the autopsy certainly lists it as contributing factor.
Most, if not all, of the hidden rooms I found offered a hot-spring to refill your life. That would have been swell, but they also added life drops, including hiding them in the fixtures you smash to reveal the doors to the hot springs. So in order to uncover a thing that refills your life, you have to collect things that refill your life. It made me realize how well done the original game’s damage/healing system was and how destructive just adding the ability to find health refills sitting around is. Hell, at one point the game teased that there was a hidden door at the entrance to the level I was on, so I jumped down to the beginning of the stage and found out that the hidden door was, you guessed it, a life refill. Well, that was totally worth starting the level over again.
I was confused at first by the level design, because the wrap-around playfield from the original game returns for the vertical stages, except now the playfield is wider than the screen is, so instead of walking through one edge of the screen and popping out the other side, you now scroll the screen like a cylinder. I never quite adapted to it, either. It was still disorienting right up until I walked through the final door of the final vertical stage.
Kid Icarus: Of Myths and Monsters is one of the strangest cases of a failed sequel I’ve ever seen. It retains the three power-ups (with the same life-based requirements) and the exact level formula of the first game. Three vertical levels and a dungeon, then three side-scrolling stages and a dungeon, then three more vertical stages and a dungeon. The only change to the formula is that the shmup finale is replaced with an actual platforming level that features free-roaming flight. That part certainly works better and the stage is probably the highlight of the game because it’s the only part that doesn’t feel like it’s made by a game designer who keeps checking their watch. Even if, when you stop and think about it, it’s functionally identical to a swimming level in a Mario game. Pump a button to stay buoyant while you navigate tight squeezes. Okay, so you’re shooting arrows instead of fireballs, but it’s the same basic concept.
Whatever. At least the level design is okay here.
But while the finale might be tolerable, at least before you take on the slow, clunky final boss fight, nothing that happens before that final stage is worth anything. NONE of the vertical levels offer the same thrills as the highlights of the NES game’s climbing sequences. It’s not just because the stakes are removed, either. They’re just not that well designed. I thought Kid Icarus had some damn elegant enemy placement, especially considering the nightmarish development cycle. The Game Boy title’s enemies often feel arbitrary. Like “well, we have to put SOMETHING here” without having any logic of how that something relates to the landscape. They also somehow made the moving platforming even slower and more miserable to utilize.
The Grim Reapers are significantly less threatening this time around.
And then there’s the side-scrolling levels, which are a complete disaster because they’re completely spammed with doors to explore. Even if you pretend there are no hidden doors, by the mid-point of the game, Kid Icarus is so completely bloated with shops, enemy chambers, test chambers, arrow upgrades, and assorted other doors that the game has no flow to it at all. When the rooms continuously offer the same stuff, that gets boring. “Just don’t go into the rooms!” But nobody is going to do that. It’s up to the designers to assure that the pace and spacing of their game isn’t interrupted by useless gameplay stoppages. You can’t put that sh*t on players. Even if they had given an actual reason to go inside every single room, I don’t want level design where the main stage has a door every few seconds. The gameplay I’m actually here for isn’t going to be inside them.
This boss looks fantastic, but it’s AWFUL. It pokes its head out for a second or two, then retracts and does the same attack pattern with no variation until one of you dies.
For all of its many, MANY problems, I was never bored with Kid Icarus on the NES, at least until the final stage. Frustrated? Sure. Annoyed? Of course. But never bored. I was SO BORED playing Kid Icarus: Of Myths and Monsters. Even the dungeons were complete letdowns. The only reason I really played the Game Boy game was to experience three more dungeons, but these ones were smaller in scope and much easier to navigate, with no real sense that they’re trying to trick you into getting lost. In the NES game, you might have to climb down a ladder, then fall to the side in order to continue towards the boss. That idea is removed completely. They never even really feel maze-like. They feel slapped-together, because they probably are. Kid Icarus often had the vibe of a game that nobody had confidence in, but this sequel is so much worse because it just doesn’t feel like it comes from a place of inspiration. It feels like Nintendo poking Kid Icarus with a stick to see if it’s really dead, and it is.
It really doesn’t help that, by the time I reached the end, I was killing the Eggplant Wizards in one shot. There’s too many arrow upgrades. What’s really remarkable is those upgrades don’t make the bosses any less spongy. I’m shuddering thinking about “what if I hadn’t gotten those?” I’d probably still be fighting the second and third bosses. Oh, and you’ll note the items work in the dungeons this time.
Now, in fairness, this wasn’t Kid Icarus’ shot at redemption any more than Return of Samus was for Metroid. The redemption would have been an SNES game made by a team that was bound and determined to turn Kid Icarus into a flagship franchise. That’s what Super Metroid was, and that series has been a pretty damn big deal ever since. I said it was unfair, but if I had been a decision maker at Nintendo and had to do a Sophie’s Choice between these two, I’d have chosen Metroid as well. The truth is, Kid Icarus’ vertical gameplay was already topped by Super Mario Bros. 2, and the shooting mechanics with a colorful cast of enemies was topped by Metroid itself, and even the potential for a game based around flying was taken over by Kirby. What really is left for Kid Icarus? The dungeons? That’s what Zelda is for. The humor that the original designer didn’t even want in the first place? Hell, that could be any Nintendo game.
The boss chambers are bigger than the screen. Don’t you just LOVE fighting super-spongy bosses who make the fight last even longer by weaving in and out of the visible playfield. No? Yeah, me neither.
It kind of hit me while making this review that Kid Icarus is just a hodgepodge of gameplay concepts that Nintendo already was building other games heavily around. Everything bad about Kid Icarus WAS improved. It just wasn’t done in a Kid Icarus game. So, my new theory is that Kid Icarus went to video game heaven because it just didn’t offer anything that you couldn’t already get elsewhere from Nintendo. Why put the resources into rescuing a franchise whose core gameplay is already found in more viable titles? The only reason to even try would be if the game’s main reputation is anything but being “the janky one.” But even fans of Kid Icarus will concede that, among famous Nintendo-developed games, it’s “the janky one.” That’s why it died, and that’s why the 3DS game was completely different. Because it kind of had to be, because Kid Icarus as a concept was already dead and forgotten before I was even born. It’s the video game equivalent of an organ donor. Of Myths and Monsters isn’t a sequel. It’s a eulogy for a potential series that died, but in doing so, it might have saved others just by providing a road map of what not to do. Verdict: NO!
Kid Icarus aka Hikari Shinwa: Palutena no Kagami Platform: Nintendo Entertainment System First Released December 19, 1986
Designed by Toru Osawa Directed by Satoru Okada Developed by Nintendo
Available with Switch Online Subscription (Standard)
This grim reaper is just so not cool. Sure, this is much better than being Dracula’s flunky, but nowhere near as righteous as teaming up with a pair of time traveling teenagers who are in the afterlife because they were murdered by evil robotic clones of themselves sent from the future by a gym teacher angry that the future is boring.
I’ve been a little too lovey-dovey with Nintendo this month, so how about a game that doesn’t get a YES!? Actually, Kid Icarus is a heartbreaker. The game is no good on its own, but it could have been an excellent first step. There’s something here that’s highly compelling that just doesn’t overcome some terrible design choices and really sloppy play control. I don’t really like the original Metroid either, but it’s in the same boat as Kid Icarus in that both games laid a foundation for something much, much better. But Metroid did get more chances to build upon the first game, and already fun games like Super Mario Bros. and Legend of Zelda got to grow out the base formula with the sequels that improved upon the core game design and especially the play control mechanics. Within just a few sequels, Nintendo had literally perfect jumping physics for Mario, combat mechanics for Zelda, and level design for Metroid. And then there’s Kid Icarus. The franchise that didn’t catch the bouquet so it gave up and became a nun. It’s not fair, really. It had just as much potential as any of their other tentpole IPs.
If you play Kid Icarus, have a second controller ready. In the American/Europe builds, pressing A+B on the second controller haggles with the shopkeepers, who may lower their prices or dramatically increase them. In the FDS version, you have to just blow into the microphone to trigger it. I’m pretty sure no FDS games actually require you to actually speak words to make the mic work. It’s like how I beat the mic games in WarioWare Touched by scratching the microphone. Also, you don’t want to ever max-out your money because you will not get enough credit for collecting money, thus failing to impress the Gods, thus not allowing you to get all four arrow strength upgrades, thus gating you out of the best ending.
Kid Icarus is among the jankiest Nintendo-developed games ever made. It’s sloppy in so many aspects that it’s tough to know where to begin. Play control is the obvious one. I should have saved “skid to my doom my darling” for this game because my most common method of dying was slipping off platforms. But, that could have been a non-factor if the levels were designed for these physics, and they clearly aren’t. Kid Icarus is riddled with things like slip-slide ice platforms, ultra-slow moving platforms, and single-block platforms. Each presents a problem on its own just based on how rough the platforming physics are, before you even take into account that you often have to perform combative maneuvers while navigating all this crap.
Son of a bitch! See, those evil mouths fly around in erratic patterns that make them hard to shoot, and then you have this spongy snowman thing that shoots projectiles at you. It seems like you can duck those projectiles, but if you duck on certain platforms, you almost instantly fall through them. That’s what I found out here, and I burned through a valuable feather.
And then there’s the ultra-jarring tonal shifts. Despite only having thirteen levels, Kid Icarus features a whopping four different styles of level design. The most famous of these is the vertical levels, which represent six of the thirteen stages, and they’re fairly notorious because, as you climb, you also create a bottomless pit, logic be damned. If a platform that had been right at the bottom of the screen is barely scrolled off it, you die if you fall where it had just been. The punishment for falling should be having to make all the jumps again and the risk of losing more health from enemies or hazards. Kid Icarus has too stiff a punishment for failure to stick the landing, and that’s especially true with the rough controls and sloppy coding. Like, look at this:
I’m not ON the platform in this picture. I’m IN the platform. I didn’t do anything special to get there except somehow short the jump without shorting it. It does matter too. Many times, while firing my bow without moving the direction pad at all, I fell off platforms. It’s so inelegant in basically every way movement in a 2D game can be. When there’s nothing under you to catch you, that’s a big problem. especially since the game leans extra-heavily into nail-biting platforming segments. MAYBE if you had the accuracy of Super Mario 1’s controls, this could have worked. But Kid Icarus instead is too floaty and has too unpredictable of momentum. So when the level design is like this:
Kid Icarus is kind of fantastic, at least in terms of the big picture. Navigating the stages, which includes a wrap-around playfield, is exhilarating. The levels look great too, so the game really shines brightly as a thoughtful, original action-adventure with solid combat and a memorable cast of baddies that are satisfying to shoot. BUT, when the level design is like this:
These are moving platforms.
These are moving platforms.
Kid Icarus becomes an unbearable slog and the platforming is NEVER exciting because it controls so poorly and the physics are so inconsistent that it never feels like YOU’RE failing. It feels like the game is screwing you, and it often is. And mind you, this is just one of FOUR play-styles in this game. There’s three more. Three of the thirteen levels are traditional side-scrollers. I guess I must be weird, but I think these levels are much, much stronger than the vertical levels.
The test chambers sadly don’t have you shooting portals. Rather you have to just stay alive until the game says “okay, you’re good” and gives you one of three really fun upgrades. One puts a shield around you, one adds a flame to your arrow that spins around it, and the other gives you additional range. They’re awesome, but the catches are ridiculous. The flame requires you to have two full bars of health, the added range three bars, and the shield four bars. The other catch really sucks: you can’t use these items in the dungeons.
Oh, they’re often still not good. Well, let me clarify: they’re haphazardly designed. For example, level 2 – 2 starts out with not one, not two, NOT three, but four goddamn doors before you encounter a single enemy. You’re supposed to use two of the doors to build up XP in order to get the arrow upgrade. This is where I learned that saving money makes no sense because the Gods get pissy if you’re stingy. But there’s nothing else like this section in the entire game. It’s total amateur hour game design.
Like this here. Kid Icarus utilizes low ceilings to cut off Pit’s ability to jump over enemies, and that COULD have been used to greater effect if they hadn’t put the most basic enemy as the “risk” side of the “risk/reward” scenario. Or if they had given you a way to logic-out which path is the best path to take.
The problem with the side-scrolling levels is they contain none of the exhilarating boldness of the vertical levels. For all the problems that those stages have, it feels like they come from a place of inspiration and there was careful consideration for enemy placement and how it relates to the jumps. I really don’t get that vibe from the side-scrolling stages at all. They certainly make fewer mistakes, nonsensical room placement aside. That’s why I think they’re stronger overall, but they also feel like they’re going through the motions. Hell, large stretches of the stages (like the aforementioned nonsense doors) feel like placeholders that got left in the final design. Don’t rule out that’s what really happened. If you don’t already know, you’ll soon find out why.
Yeah, yeah, I used a guide. The treasure rooms (pictured here) have a sequence to them where you can win every time. What I didn’t know is that the Gods frown upon breaking pots in the treasure rooms. So I didn’t get the final arrow upgrade and thus I didn’t get the best ending.
And then there’s the grand finale of Kid Icarus, where all the janky but memorable platforming action is dumped in favor of one of the worst shmups I’ve ever experienced, and I’ve been playing a whole lot of shmups in 2025. Hoo boy, what a dumpster fire Kid Icarus is at the end. In it, you have to shoot bland targets like falling tiles and an enemy that splits into three over and over and over until you reach a certain benchmark for “doing things.” After the game is satisfied you’re not on cruise control, it’ll let you fight Medusa, which has a safe zone so big that you could build a nursery in it. The level getting there is what drives a stake through Kid Icarus’ heart because suddenly the act of moving is hard. The controls are heavy and unresponsive for the finale, and even if that wasn’t the case, the last level would be a disaster anyway because this style of game is not at all compatible with all the gameplay that came before it. It’s one of the worst final levels and final bosses in any Nintendo game.
How did Kid Icarus turn out so janky when games like Mario, Zelda, and even Metroid, at the very least, control well? Actually, Metroid is kind of to blame, but really it was just bad corporate decisions. Metroid was considered a very high prospect game, so Nintendo devoted all their resources to it while one guy, the debuting Toru Osawa (who went on to direct games like Mario Clash and Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time) had to spec out Kid Icarus all by his lonesome. He had to design the world, the enemies, and most of the levels. He only got a full working team to help him once Metroid was mostly done, and then the team he got were exhausted from doing the already dead-serious space adventure so they usurped his concept of a dead-serious mythological adventure by inserting “humorous” things like the credit card and the Eggplant Wizard.
Kid Icarus was the first game released in North America with the revolutionary MMC1 chip that allowed the NES to do bigger, more detailed games. In screenshots, it looks amazing. But you actually have to play it.
But the thing is, while the staff liberally plied Kid Icarus with humor and stuff like the haggling with the shopkeepers, what nobody bothered to do was refine the actual gameplay. Then the release date was set for the end of 1986, well ahead of when the game could reasonably be completed, so everyone just hung around Nintendo HQ in the freezing cold (apparently the building wasn’t heated) to finish the game. They BARELY finished in time, and in fact, Kid Icarus was only sent to manufacturing three days before it was set to release. Consequently, it wasn’t subject to the same type of play testing and polishing that other games from this era got. Kid Icarus is Nintendo’s E.T.: The Extra-Terrestrial, and it speaks volumes to how talented they really were even back then that the final product is as good as it is. But what we got is a fraction of its potential. Nobody did the responsible thing and delayed it.
Yet another example of jank are these things. Touching them even once costs you the power items you won in the test chambers, which you either have to win back in another test chamber or buy back on the black market. MAYBE this could have worked if you could fight back and reclaim the item before they vanish off the screen. That would add proper risk/reward balance. Well, you can’t because they’re indestructible. What an overall terrible game. Well, except one aspect………
“Cathy, you left out one gameplay type.” I know, but I saved it for last for a reason. Because the one thing Kid Icarus unambiguously does well, it does it so well that I almost want to cry that it’s not the whole game. It’s the dungeons, which are kind of like side-view versions of Zelda’s dungeons. I mean much more than Adventures of Link’s dungeons. They’re designed like legitimate mazes, where you might think you’re plotting the right course only to find out the room you’re making your way to has no means to continue on the path you’re trying to take. Well, at least two out of three of them are like that. Because I enjoyed these levels so much, I put away the guide and it took me quite a while to beat levels 1 – 4 and 2 – 4. Then in the third dungeon (3 – 4), I found the boss so quickly that it took me a moment to process it. I literally couldn’t believe it was placed where it was, which was next to a shop.
The hammers you collect in the levels via the harps or treasure rooms can be used to smash these statues in the dungeons, which free the Centurions that were turned to stone by Medusa. You want to do this because they’ll help you fight the (relatively spongy) bosses. Too bad they have absolutely no survival instinct.
But the dungeon levels worked for me. Oh, did they ever. And that’s why it’s such a punch to the gut that there’s only three of them. I can’t help but wonder if Kid Icarus would have been better off being based entirely around this specific style. Instead of nine total vertical and side-scrolling stages and the lame-ass shmup finale, I would have preferred a game that had eight to ten dungeons. Had they gone that route, I honestly think Kid Icarus might be remembered as highly as Metroid or Zelda. I think the combat-focused maze explorer done in this style and with these themes, separate from Nintendo’s other flagship IPs, makes Kid Icarus stand tall in a crowded field. The problem is, in order to play these three amazing dungeons, you have to play nine mediocre-at-best levels that are really nothing like the dungeons.
There’s no happy ending here, because Kid Icarus is one of the few early Nintendo franchises that they never put a good faith effort into building upon that initial foundation. There’s a Game Boy sequel that I might take a look at soon (Update: the review is up) that apparently has most of the same problems, and then there’s the 3DS game which basically is nothing like the original game, changing the genre and gameplay. These days, Pit is more famous for his role in Smash Bros. than he is as the star of his own franchise. This despite the fact that Kid Icarus was big enough decades ago that it contributed a main character to the unwatchable animated series/Nintendo infomercial Captain N: The Game Master, and then was still memorable enough in the present era that it was one of the games featured in 2024’s Nintendo World Championships: NES Edition. Granted, Kid Icarus had the challenge that took me the most attempts to get an “S” rating and that outcome was largely the result of the sloppiness of the whole thing. But, nearly forty years later and Nintendo actually said “yeah, we better put Kid Icarus in this thing.” But the one thing they’ve never done is redeemed that original base concept.
Okay, so the boss graphics aren’t strong. That’s supposed to be Cerberus in the corner, but instead it looks like two dinosaurs humping. After having unforgettable sprites for the Eggplant Wizard, grim reaper, and even the basic enemies, having this thing look like someone sneezed while filling it in is such a let down.
What Nintendo should do is take all the space age technology they’ve since invented and do a true sequel to Kid Icarus. Not a third person shooter either, but a REAL sequel that builds much more heavily around the best part of the game: those dungeons. If you want, go ahead and make a few vertical levels as well. I’m fine with that because they would certainly have to apply everything that’s been learned in the fields of level design and play control. They could keep the humor or dump it like Osawa wanted. That doesn’t matter because gameplay is king. Kid Icarus is a bad video game, but not ALL bad. It just never got the redemption that Nintendo’s own game design evolution would have given it. Those amazing dungeons still feel fresh in 2025 because, really, there aren’t a lot of Nintendo-made games where their exploration feels like Kid Icarus’s three dungeons. It might not be a game worth playing in the 2020s, but the idea of Kid Icarus is an idea worth saving. Verdict: NO!
Super Mario World Platform: Super Nintendo Entertainment System First Released November 21, 1990 (JP) August 23, 1991 (US) Directed by Takashi Tezuka Developed by Nintendo Available with Switch Online Subscription (Standard) Listing on Mario Wiki
Is Mario pointing at what to eat or is he slapping the side of Yoshi’s head? Because if it’s a slap, and since all dinosaurs are birds, is this just the first step towards preparing a meal of foie gras?
Gosh, uh, this is awkward. Because when I reviewed Super Mario 3 last week, I said that Super Mario World was the gourmet meal to Mario 3’s bag of highly addictive potato chips. Now that I just played through Super Mario World using the same rules as the other games in my Super Mario 40th Anniversary Marathon where I have to play through every level without using any items to bypass the action (see my reviews for Super Mario Deluxe, Lost Levels, Doki Doki Panic, and Super Mario Advance), I really thought I would enjoy Mario World’s level design the most of any “traditional” Mario game. Super Mario 2/Doki Doki’s level design is hard to top, but that’s a totally different style of game. I thought Mario World was the peak of “pure Mario” design and I would have the time of my life studying it. Well, I didn’t. It wasn’t that I was bored playing Mario World, either. It’s awesome. One of the best 2D platformers ever made, easily. Even needing to immediately replay some levels so I could score a 100% didn’t bother me at all. But the massive upgrade over Super Mario 3 that I remembered never showed up. What just happened?
Remember kids: pick the middle file or they win.
For years now, I’ve always held World up as the benchmark of platforming mechanics. THAT I’ll still stand by that. Super Mario World has the most intuitive jumping physics of ANY Super Mario game, 2D or 3D. It’s so intuitive that you can launch yourself off Yoshi, fly through the air and hit a question mark, and then stick the landing on Yoshi’s back without even needing to really think about it. It becomes second nature in record time. Okay, so the cape takes practice, but it also offers a lot more versatility than the raccoon tail. It can also be used to bypass large sections of the game. More on that later. But the point is that Mario World is the most polished 2D playground that ever existed up to this point. You’re provided the tools to make the controller vanish in your hand. You can tell that Nintendo realized they had to make the best controlling platformer ever in order to make sure players adapted to the new six-button SNES controller, and they nailed it. The controls are perfect.
Like Mario 3, I found the bosses overall to be weak. Before the Bowser fight, I guess I liked the Reznors the most. It’s really not that different in the way you fight it than, say, dealing with Hammer Bros. in any other Mario game. But it’s staged differently and it works. The first time, at least, but then an identical fight happens three more times and the thrill is lost.
The levels are less than perfect. Oh, they’re certainly better than Mario 3’s. Most of the seventy-three full-sized stages are bigger in scope and scale than anything in Mario 3. They also better incentivize exploration. On the map screen, you’ll notice that normal levels have yellow and red dots. Stages with red dots have two exits, and acing the game requires you to not simply beat every stage but find every alternative exit. But, only a little over a third of the levels actually utilize that, and if you miss an exit, the game doesn’t tell you. After I thought I had everything, I played the second form of the Bowser stage, won the fight, and then reset the game after the credits to find out I had 93 out of 96. I found two exits I was missing, which got me up to 95, but then I was stumped. It was actually Star Road 3, which can be beaten in about three seconds. I just never crossed the tape on it. But I had to figure that out on my own. It didn’t indicate which levels I’d found everything on.
The haunted ship feels like a missed opportunity. It’s just an underwater ghost house that doesn’t utilize the maze concept as well as it should. Simply swimming around enemies isn’t as exciting to me.
The actual gameplay is also a clear upgrade over Mario 3. Okay, so I don’t think the cast of enemies is quite as memorable as Mario 3’s. The dinosaur-themed basic enemies just don’t feel very Mario-like. Even though the Adventure Island games don’t really use evil dinosaurs, the dino-cast part of Mario World’s roster feels like it would be more at home there. On the other hand, Mario World’s non-enemy obstacles are stellar. It has a much wider variety of indestructible hazards, and with the new spinning jump, you might even be able to use them to your advantage. Like in this level:
You could play it safe, like I did this time. Or you can throw caution to the wind, take a deep breath, and do a running spin jump and try to bounce across them and hope like hell you’ll eventually reach land, and it’s exhilarating. Or you can use Yoshi to do it since Yoshi’s feet are immune. Speaking of Yoshi, this was his debut game and he’s a lot of fun to use. He also adds an interesting risk-reward dynamic to the exploration. It’s tougher to explore with Yoshi. You can’t climb vines with him. You can’t use the cape’s parachuting mechanic with him. That’s one of the biggest differences between Mario 3 and this game: there’s a lot more consideration for tempting the player to choose the wrong thing. Instead of the game funneling you by providing you with the exact right tools you need, it might do something like offer you a fire flower when you really need the cape. There’s small hints of this in Mario 3, but it happens constantly in Mario World, and I love it for it.
YOU ARE A SUPER……. OVALTINE DRINKER?! Son of a bitch!
So why didn’t I have as good a time as I thought I would? Maybe Mario World is just a one-and-done experience, and I’ve done it before. Unlike Mario 3, I remembered where almost everything was. Even if I didn’t remember the specific locations of keys or the solutions to the Ghost Houses, I remembered enough to have a general idea of what I was supposed to do. Worst case was I mixed up the solution for one ghost house with another, which I did a couple times. Otherwise, I apparently didn’t forget anything about Mario World. Okay, well, how much difference could THAT make? After all, Super Mario 1 and Super Mario 3 offered me no surprises either. Well, except for one key element: challenge. Mario World didn’t. I died four times this entire play session, and two of them were in the “Special Zone” area. All but one death was the result of mistimed jumps. I even stuck to the rule of playing the levels instead of bypassing them with the cape, and I just utterly shredded Mario World. It’s too damn easy. I had the max 99 lives before I even got out of the third world.
You know the bonus stage that you get for breaking the tape, pictured above? After a while, curiosity got the better of me and I tried to see if I could not win any lives playing it. I needed eleven total cracks at it before I finally did it. Twice I got one life, and every other time I deliberately tried to lose, I got two or more. I couldn’t even lose a mini game on purpose. Yeesh.
I think the reserve items were a bad idea in general. But, I also think the cape is too powerful and allows you to cheese stages too easily. Mario 3 had a similar problem with the raccoon tail, and while I noticed Mario World did a better job of limiting places you can build-up a running start, if I had wanted to I could have easily skipped several sections. It got me wondering if flying is a good idea at all in Mario games. If you’re going to do it, the way Super Mario 64 did it seems like the best way to handle it. Instead of the flying cap being a permanent upgrade, you have a time limit to accomplish what needs to be done. It seems like work, because I had very few “cheer out loud” moments with the 2D flying sequences, but plenty with the cap in the 3D game.
It’s no coincidence that the most exciting flying sections in the game, at least for me, used the balloon, which has a strict time limit.
Mostly, I think it’s because Mario World is more of an experience than a game. As colorful and interesting as Mario World is to just gawk at, you just have too big an advantage over it even if you force yourself into the thick of battle, especially if you know what’s coming. So this leaves me in a weird position where my gut still tells me that Super Mario World is the better game because of the more elegant level design and historically great play mechanics, BUT, it still wasn’t the game I enjoyed the most during this marathon. That still belongs to Super Mario Advance 4: Super Mario Bros. 3, and not just for the eReader levels, either. Subtract those and I still give the slight edge to Mario 3 based on the fact that I couldn’t just sleepwalk my way through it. I might have had more fun playing Mario World over Mario 3 in 2003, but in 2025, my replay of Mario 3 required me to actually focus and think about what I was doing. It’s something I just learned: challenge matters more the second time than the first. It’s the real replay value.
The one and only boss in the game that ticks all the boxes (except maybe challenge) is the Bowser fight. Mario World has TERRIBLE boss fights, right up until the finale, where Bowser has a memorable design and a fun way of attacking him. Each of the six shots you need to land on him feel great. If you ignore “the weird one” in Mario 2, this is the first truly great Mario boss.
I had the same problem with Shadow of the Colossus once, too. The second time I played through it, even though it was as good as I remembered, it wasn’t as fun as I thought it would be, either. Maybe that’s the paradox of historically great games. Once a game reaches the status of “unforgettable” in the literal sense, it actually becomes harder to hold up to replaying. That’s because all that’s left is the base challenge the game has. So while Mario World is truly excellent the first time around, it’s never going to come close to being as enjoyable because too much of it is based around the sense of discovery or other surprises. Besides the cheesable stuff with the cape, it doesn’t even really lend itself to the type of scrutiny that comes with reevaluation because Super Mario World is so damn awesome that it’s almost boring to reevaluate. Almost.
I still loved the “find key and insert it into keyhole” bit but that was quite muffled by the fact that most of the keys are right next to the hole. This feels like Mario World’s biggest missed opportunity to crank-up the difficulty. Just place the keys further away from the holes.
Again, I had fun yesterday. It’s hard not to when the controls are this perfect and the gameplay is as fine-tuned as you see here. I just didn’t have as much fun as I expected. So I can take the glass half-empty approach and say that Mario World has too many slow and dull auto-scrolling levels and not as strong of a basic enemy roster as Mario 3 so I may have overrated it before. Or I can take the glass half-full approach and say that Super Mario World is so well made that it’s perfect your first time playing and doesn’t lend itself to fun retrospective looks. I’ll go with Option B because that way it’s not my fault I didn’t have as much fun as I wanted. Verdict: YES!
WarioWare, Inc.: Mega Microgames! Platform: Game Boy Advance First Released March 21, 2003 Directed by Hirofumi Matsuoka Developed by Nintendo Available with a Switch Online Expansion Pack Subscription Listing at Mario Wiki
Behold: the one and only time I won the third stage of the nose picking game. My skills have eroded badly.
When I started Indie Gamer Chick, if you had asked me what my all-time favorite video game was, this would have been my answer. WarioWare Inc.: Mega Microgame$! for the Game Boy Advance. Not the best video game I’d ever played. That still hasn’t changed. In 2011, I would have answered with Portal, Tetris, or Shadow of the Colossus. In 2025, I’d narrow it down and say Shadow of the Colossus is the greatest achievement in game design of all-time. But that’s the BEST video game, and I think it’s okay to name one game the best and another your personal favorite. I’m talking about the game that, for whatever reason, I personally had the best time with.
I had to reach a score of 80 on Crygor’s stage (my highest of any of the levels BY FAR this entire play session) to get this, the last mini-game I needed for a full set. It just would not spit it out.
WarioWare wouldn’t even have that title today. If I was stuck on a desert island and given the option to only have WarioWare or Super Mario Odyssey, well, I’d probably say “f*ck that” and swim for it. Assuming that wasn’t an option, I’d take Mario Odyssey. Which, by the way, I take a lot of comfort from. Today is my 36th birthday (at least it was when I was typing this review, but I didn’t hit publish until after midnight the next day), and I think it would be tragic if I’d already had the best time I will ever have playing a video game when I was 14. The fact that it took fifteen years for that to be taken over by a different game is fine, because that means it could change again. Gaming probably hasn’t “peaked” for me at 36. That puts a smile on my face.
Goddamn this game is full of nightmare fuel. That’s not even the scariest potato in the game.
Now granted, people have ALWAYS been baffled by how I could love WarioWare as much as I do. And by that I mean the first game and not the franchise. For the most part, I don’t even like the WarioWare franchise. That’s the thing that really bugs everyone. I only really loved the first one. A few years ago, I enjoyed WarioWare: Get it Together just fine, but even though I spent over a week playing it when it came out, I can’t name a single micro game from it. Not one. My brain just completely bleached its existence from my head, and I didn’t even bother buying the latest game in the series. WarioWare was fun the first time, but it’s only the first one that really avoids that “trying too hard to be quirky” vibe. The others all feel like they’re trying to top this game in terms of weirdness. But, I didn’t play this because it’s weird. Oh, that got my attention, but it was the score-driven gameplay that hooked me.
As a kid, I hated this game. I fancied myself smart, but I could never properly calculate this one. Today I……… uh, well, I mean….. yeah.
The strange thing is, besides pinball, I’d never really been into high score games, but that’s all WarioWare really is. Try to complete an increasingly difficult series of bite-sized mini-games that are shot at you at an increasingly higher speed until you run out of misses. It’s such an uncomplicated game that you only use the D-Pad and one button, the A button. Everything else goes unused, and they mined this simple control scheme for 150 micro-games, though some are just the same game reskinned. There’s also tons of games that are just about mashing the A button or stopping a meter in time.
This is one of those games that, for whatever reason, was one of my weaknesses.
But, while it’s impossible to claim that all the games feel distinct, that’s not the point. It’s the random nature of “you never know what games will come in what order” and the fact that the action speeds up. Later versions of WarioWare did a much better job of tying each level’s games to a central theme, but MOST of this first game isn’t like that. Sometimes it is, like all the games in Orbulon’s stage are “intelligence-based” so they’re like IQ test type of things and have a longer time limit. The games of Jimmy the hipster are sports-themed. But, most of the mini-games could be in any character’s collection. In fact, many actually do repeat even outside the levels that feature games from every collection. But, what makes it work over future installments of WarioWare is that there’s no sense of gimmickness to it. This is gaming stripped to its purist minimalist form. In a sense, this is the closest Nintendo ever came to their old Zapper games where personality needed to carry otherwise VERY simple gameplay.
Here’s the game’s most evil potato. It’s still only the second most evil potato I’ve encountered in my life. It’s evil, but not as evil as the one that told me I should set my parents’ bed on fire.
And that’s why it succeeds. WarioWare is oozing in personality. There’s no one graphical style and seemingly anything goes, from a girl who has to suck her snot back up her nose to navigating a mosquito past bug spray to bite a baby. Actually, if not for all the Nintendo stuff, I don’t think anyone would ever guess this was a Nintendo game. Some of the graphics are hand-drawn. Some are pixelated. Some are stick figures and others are actual digital photos. It’s so completely weird and original. Like, one game looks like this:And the next might look like this:
And you have to process the change in graphics and gameplay style and react right away. But it works. The simple instructions and simple objectives make this the greatest quick-draw game ever made. Even in the days before online scores, I found myself trying to play long enough to just make it one game further than my best run on any level. It’s addictive. And it does hold up to the test of time. I don’t think any of the ones that followed would have. I didn’t even really like WarioWare Gold. I also didn’t play too many of the side-quest mini-games and I never even tried the multiplayer games in WarioWare before yesterday. I did this play session and exactly one of them was fun. It’s this one:
I was the top player. I fell off the cliff seconds later, but we don’t need to talk about that, Sasha. Oh, and show of hands: who thought the thing on the bottom half of the screen was SpongeBob SquarePants the first time they played this? (raises hand)
Chicken Race actually does use L and R so that two players can compete on a single Game Boy Advance (or Nintendo Switch in this case). Both players hold and release their respective shoulder buttons and try to get as close to the cliff as possible without falling off. I wanted to play a couple rounds and Sasha and I ended up playing it for half an hour. As a kid, I also played a ton of the paper airplane game, where you have to guide an airplane as far as you can without crashing. WarioWare offers tons of distractions, but none of them can hold a candle to the core gameplay. It’s easily Nintendo’s best arcade game since they got out of the arcade business. They should do more games like this, really. I don’t mean more WarioWare, but more simple, scoring-driven arcade style games. They’re really good at it.
My best this session was 125. As a kid, I got into the 300s a few times.
Playing WarioWare today, it’s not hard to imagine how this could have ever been my #1 favorite game ever. I played it for close to a week and the only reason I’m stopping is to write this review. Then I have to move on to other games. I never did end up breaking for 100 points on any of the levels like I did as a teenager. I’m old now and my reaction time sucks. But I accept the new reality of my increasingly decrepit state and so when I had 44 in one round and 46 the next, I felt pretty damn good about myself. WarioWare is STILL fun to challenge yourself with. Eventually the personality that eases you into the game gives way to one of the most white-knuckle tests of your muscle memory that you can get on Switch Online.
My arch nemesis with WarioWare in this play session was any game that required button mashing, of which there are far too many. This is one of them. This should count as my Metroid 1 review, by the way. No? Fine.
Playing WarioWare today reminds me of how STUPID I was as a kid. Not for choosing this as my #1 game. No, it was a good choice. WarioWare isn’t perfect. Too many button mashers. Not every game lends itself to speeding up. Some of the games don’t scale well enough to have three difficulty levels. But as a first-of-its-kind experiment, it’s fantastic. One of Nintendo’s best games ever, really. And I was stupid for not realizing that challenging my own high scores is something I would enjoy in other games. I had a snobbish streak even through my 20s. I didn’t understand the point of chasing offline high scores at all, except for this game. These days, I can sit down with Pac-Man or really any 80s arcade game and just chasing the score alone makes my play session fly by, which makes my review process easier even for bad games. WarioWare hasn’t changed, but I have. Do I like WarioWare as much as I did in my youth? I don’t know, but I know I admire it more now than I ever did before. Verdict: YES!
Super Mario Advance 4: Super Mario Bros. 3 Platform: Game Boy Advance First Released July 11, 2003 (my 14th birthday!) Directed by Hiroyuki Kimura Developed by Nintendo Available with a Switch Online Expansion Pack Subscription Listing at Mario Wiki
After not having that tough a time playing Lost Levels, I got swallowed by a goddamn fish three times.
Super Mario Bros. 3 is one of the most celebrated video games ever, and one of the most studied. If you have twenty minutes to spare, well, please keep reading because I work really hard on these things. BUT if you have forty minutes, after me, go read everything Cutting Room Floor has on Mario 3 because it’s fascinating. The amount of drawing-board content that made it into the final game’s code rivals the volume of deleted content you’d see in something like a modern Grand Theft Auto game. It’s also the final console-based Super Mario game to first release before I was born. More importantly for the sake of this feature, Mario 3 is a game that I tend not to like anywhere near as much as my older readers, and I swear to God, it’s not just for the sake of being contrarian. Who would actually say something that’s good isn’t just to be a prick? Well, that’s not my argument with Mario 3 anyway. I like it a lot! I just don’t love it.
In the making of this review, I 100%ed Mario Advance 4. No levels were skipped. No P-Wings were used. I didn’t use rewind to cheat and I never laid down a single save state. I also got every Advance Coin and e-Coin out of the 38 E-Reader levels. Then I replayed probably 25% of the core levels to figure out why I was just not digging them as much as my older readers. The answer involves one-of-a-kind circumstances that can never be replicated along with a dash of science! And if you’re looking at the above picture and saying “hold on, what?” and you’re a Switch online expansion pack subscriber, stop reading now, pick up your Switch, open up Mario Advance 4 and go play the E-Reader levels. It’s cool. I already got your click. It might screw up my “average read time” though so just leave the window open. Thanks.
I can’t appreciate the level of anticipation that gamers of the 1980s went through in the lead-up to Mario 3’s release. I mean, of course there were games I looked forward to as a child, but Mario 3 was arguably the last major game to come out before anything resembling a console war was happening. It’s a situation that will likely never be replicated. The Genesis didn’t really blow up until 1991, so Nintendo stood alone and Mario 3 was the single biggest title that kids wanted. For anyone my age, go back to your childhood and think of the game you wanted the most, and now imagine it was the ONLY game in town, with McDonald’s Happy Meal toys and a cartoon series and motion picture tied into the advertising campaign. Yeah, this will never happen again.
I swear there will be a game review here. Eventually. But this stuff is important to the review I’m going with, trust me.
Super Mario Bros. 3 came out in North America a whopping 477 days AFTER the Famicom release. Publicly, Nintendo blames a ROM shortage, but I think there’s more to it. Oh, I’m sure there was some ROM manufacturing hiccup, but I think they took advantage of it because they didn’t want Mario 3 to cannibalize Game Boy sales. It was their first non-NES device that was released around the time Mario 3 was originally penciled-in and they sort of needed it to do really good to prove they weren’t a flash in the pan. Maybe selling millions of copies of Mario 3 AND millions of Game Boys in 1989 would have been a flex, but who knows? Maybe it could have gone the other way. Gaming had already crashed once, and asking for Mario 3 undermined the Game Boy’s pitch. This is still firmly the “most children’s bedrooms didn’t have a TV” era, and Nintendo’s pitch to parents was “buy your child a Game Boy and get the living room TV back!” But if children in 1989 were asked “it’s either a Game Boy or Mario 3, so take your pick” I think they pick Mario 3, don’t you? Hell, the most famous Mario 3 ad doesn’t show a single f*cking second of gameplay. That’s how hyped the game was, and if Nintendo forced a competition between their own products, I think Mario 3 would have left Game Boy in a smoking crater. Why even create the possibility for that scenario if you don’t need to?
Well, clearly they didn’t need to. Assuming I’m right, sitting from my comfortable distance decades later, I kind believe they were vindicated for the choice to delay. Game Boy was a big hit and Super Mario Land is one of the biggest sellers ever. So was Super Mario Bros. 3 for that matter. The extra time allowed Nintendo to go hard on the Mario 3 advertising with a media blitz that included a Happy Meal promotion at McDonald’s and a cartoon series that was so popular that reruns were still on TV when I was a child. I thought it was completely unwatchable when I was 6 years old and I think it’s still unwatchable now that I’m about to turn 36 years old. Okay, TECHNICALLY the Adventures of Super Mario Bros. 3 aired after the game released, something I wish I had checked on before I watched the entire f*cking series, all twenty-six 10-minute-long shorts, for this feature. Here’s my review: Oh God, the Koopa Kids (who are all the wrong names for some reason, WTF is that about?) are a parody of Ninja Turtles. HAH, because they’re turtles! Someone got paid to make that connection. Oh God, Milli Vanilli is on the show. That sounds like I’m making a joke but I’m not. That’s really them. Oh God, Luigi’s a dog now. Is that a thing they planned for the game?
Nope, this doesn’t work for me. I need someone to take a drill to my head and get it out. I’m not kidding. It feels like The Adventures of Super Mario Bros. 3 is digging at my skull from the inside. Get it out. GET IT OUT! GET IT OUT! GET IT OUT! GET IT OUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUT!
Most famously of all, Mario 3 was the climax of a feature length Nintendo/Universal Studios advertisement called The Wizard, which was released in theaters two months before Mario 3’s US debut. No need to drill this one out of my head. My film buff sister and her pretentious friends (sorry, sis) watched it during a “bad movie marathon” last year and honestly they didn’t think it was bad enough to be included, because it’s not so much “bad” as it is “completely shameless, cynical, and/or soulless.” Even though I was there ruining the experience for them by pointing out that not a single one of the video game scenes in that movie makes a lick of sense. Somehow Jimmy got 50,000 points on Double Dragon in approximately thirty seconds. I tried this myself, syncing Double Dragon for the NES with the scene in the movie. In my best run, my score from the opening cinematic (seen in the movie) until the time Fred Savage says “50,000?!” was 2,050 points.
I guess that’s why Jimmy is the Wizard and I’m not.
That’s even giving me a full extra second or two since Fred Savage needed a moment to process that his brother is obviously a legitimate wizard. As in a practitioner of sorcery and/or witchcraft who clearly possesses the Time Gem, and possibly all the other Infinity Gems which he used not wipe out half of all life in the universe but instead change the scoresheet for Double Dragon so that every landed shot scores about 4,000 points, give or take. Diabolic. Hey, it’s either that or there was a cigarette burn on the screen right where the score is displayed that looked like the number 50,000. What? It could happen! The Wizard is the definitive “kids’ product made by people cashing in on a kids’ trend who aren’t interested in figuring out why the popular thing is popular.” And it’s really bad about it, too. Even Roger Ebert said he knew that the shots of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles that were purported to be of the third stage were only the first stage while Gene Siskel recognized that nobody who made this loved the games featured. It’s THAT obvious, even to a non-gamer. But ask gamers at the time if they remember that part, and they don’t. They remember this:
Even though that scene makes no sense either. Why would they be scoring points as soon as the host said “GO!” How would Jimmy even know the warp whistle is there? Why would warping boost his points? Shouldn’t he be scoring no points while he f*cks around with the warp whistle, and how did he even know how to activate it in the first place? Why would losing a life cost you points? If Jimmy lost so many points, how did he still win when Lucas is the only one on stage who never died? This thing has more plot holes in the big finale than all of Season 8 of Game of Thrones. I take back what I said about the Wizard, because it’s so much worse than simply being disinterested in what kids are into. It’s a movie made by people who think kids are stupid. Not that it matters. It more than doubled its modest $6 million budget at the box office, and that’s before you consider that normal Hollywood metrics don’t apply since the movie was not meant as a normal movie but as a feature length advertisement heavily subsidized by outside forces. Hell, even the finale I’m pretty sure was partially subsidized by the state of California for a sh*thole roadside attraction, the Cabazon Dinosaurs. I went there as a kid before it was turned into a creationist museum (I just found out it’s back to being a run of the mill tourist trap), and remember it had an intense musty smell.
Pictured above: how this review is going. But I do have a point: I want you to consider everything I talked about above. Prerelease circumstances that have never, and will never, be replicated. I think that’s part of the reason why Super Mario Bros. 3 is a huge deal to my older readers and not so much to my generation. I’ve met plenty of people who have it on their short list of “greatest video games of all-time.” I’m so sorry to my 40-something to 50-something readers, but I’ve never really understood it, because I don’t think Super Mario Bros. 3 should even be in the GOAT conversation. It’s fine. The flying racoon idea (with tail-whip attack) was inspired. Some of the levels are truly breath-taking. The enemy design especially never gets the credit it deserves. I think the roster of basic enemies is even better than Mario 2’s. Super Mario Bros. 3 is a solidly good game. Maybe even a great game. Maybe, as in I wouldn’t passionately argue against someone who wants to call it “great.” BUT, I do have a case to make against its greatness.
One of my biggest problems is that I think the Koopalings are boring bosses. They’re not that different from the Boom Booms in the fortresses (which I also think suck, they’re too easy to cheese). In fact, only this one pictured here feels different from the other six. Before fans get mad at me, I didn’t think they were particularly strong in Super Mario World either. Want to know the best appearance by the Koopa Kids? It’s EASILY Yoshi’s Safari (as seen in my Definitive Review of Nintendo light gun games), where each of them feels unique. Ironically, the game where you point a f*cking bazooka at them is the only one where they don’t feel like cannon fodder.
Mario 3’s base game only has a couple stages I’d consider to be particularly strong. Don’t read that as “she’s saying the levels suck” because I’m not. My attitude towards the base game in general is “it’s fine” and when it comes to the level design I’m going to stick with “it’s fine.” Except, you know, when it’s not. It just often feels like there’s no good incentives to explore the levels. Take level 2 – 1 for example. They built these two massive hollow structures that you literally walk over the top of. You can go inside them and collect an extra life and some coins. Except extra lives are plentiful and coins just aren’t enough of a reward. This is just bad risk/reward design and a poor use of real estate, and if this were ANY game but Super Mario Bros. 3, I think people would universally say this is nonsensical design.
As punishment for nonsensical design on the part of designers, I made Mario, their bread and butter, wear the Tanooki suit in the scorching-hot desert environment. You made me do this, Nintendo.
But that kind of head-scratching design is all over Super Mario Bros. 3. Even in levels that are fun to explore. You’ll notice that I didn’t say the structures themselves are stupid or anything because I’m not sh*ting on them. Their shapes are perfectly logical platforming game layouts. Good enemy placement on the inside. Not so much the roofs, which are, you know, the parts you have to actually walk across to get to the end of the stage, which is right there past the second structure. Hell, the second one didn’t even have a single enemy on its roof. But I think the little jumping flames inside the structures are quality enemies and a credible threat to Mario. There’s just not a good reason to go inside of them. This could have easily been fixed by creating some kind of circumstance that necessitates going through structures. A key. A switch. Anything besides a nominal reward with no risk/reward balance consideration.
The one thing about Mario 3 that I just plain do not like are the maps. I think the whole map system is TERRIBLE. Bypassing levels. Confusing pipes. The airships flying off to other parts of the map and creating busy work, especially if you went for a 100% like I did. Shouldn’t scoring a 100% in the world before you enter the castle just automatically anchor the airship so you don’t have to play fetch every single time you die on the stage?
But the thing that bothers me most about Mario 3, and this will annoy my older readers quite a bit I imagine: I think it’s too conservative. Like, the Tanooki suit can make invisible things visible, including platforms and doors. You can do a LOT with that idea, but they really didn’t. There’s only a small handful of uses for it, most of them quite subtle, and none of which made me sit up in my chair. The Hammer Bros. suit can kill enemies other suits can’t, but they never once built a stage specifically tailored to that strength. I hate to keep using the same argument, but if ANY OTHER GAME had an item like the Hammer Bros. suit and never once worked up the courage to make a level where it’s a necessity instead of a luxury item, I think the average gamer would question why they bothered. And you know they’re capable of better since they certainly did a good job building reasons to use Racoon Mario or even Frog Mario.
No complaints about the Frog Suit. It’s the one element of Super Mario Bros. 3 where the risk/reward factors are given proper balance. Okay, so the maps could have used much more clear indicators of what stages have practical usages for it.
Now, in fairness, Mario 3 does offer plenty of highlights. World 1, as in every single stage in Grass Land, is one of the most downright scientifically perfect opening sequences ever in any platform game. The absolute perfect education for everything to come. Along with Mario 1’s World 1, these stages could be the whole curriculum of game design school for how to introduce mechanics into your game. After World 1, the level design keeps up a consistent drip of uniqueness, including several one-off moments. You don’t expect that from a 1988 game. The most famous is, of course, the shoe. Hey, who doesn’t love the shoe? I mean, it would probably be lame as hell if it was just a regular roster item, but it ain’t! It just shows up in a seemingly random World 5 stage (specifically 5 – 3), gives you a short playground that takes under two minutes to beat even if you f*ck around, and then it’s taken away from you and never shows up again until it had its mystique utterly shat upon by about fifty-thousand uncreative people in Mario Maker.
It’s just so random, you know? “Hey, for this level, ride a shoe!” In fairness, if the shoe had been an option in World 7, you might as well gather the kids around and tell them that World 7 is going to a farm upstate where it’ll get to run around free and happy with all the other worlds.
That’s the thing though. For all my bitching, the bite-sized level format also kind of makes the game bullet-proof. Even when Mario 3 is outright bad, and on rare occasions it is, it’s still okay because, barring a loss of life, you’re two minutes or less away from something that’s different. Well, besides those damn airships, all of which felt interchangeable except the first one (again, perfectly balanced like everything else in World 1) and the last one (the series of speedy ones in World 8). I’m really not a fan of auto-scrolling in platforming games and I didn’t enjoy the airship concept at all. Otherwise, nobody can accuse the levels in Super Mario 3 of feeling samey. There’s clearly an effort being made to give stages individual personalities, unique game design goals, and their own one of a kind “vibe” for lack of a better term.
While World 1 might be “perfect” my favorite world, except for that busy-work-inducing map, is World 7. Something about it just worked for me.
That’s the ground Mario 3 really broke, and it’s VERY modern in that regard. A rapid-fire series of unique platforming challenges that hit one after another, with tonal whiplash that would leave you in a neck brace if it were any genre but a 2D platformer. That individualism overrides the actual gameplay content. While I might be very frustrated by how de-emphasized exploration is, I’m also picking nits with full knowledge that’s NOT the point. Mario 3 isn’t a five course meal. It’s a bag of potato chips. That’s not an insult, by the way. Who doesn’t pig out on potato chips? You can’t just stop at one! That’s the point! It’s why I don’t really think there were any truly stand-out “holy crap that level was amazing” moments in Mario 3. Instead, it just maintained a consistent tempo of quality stages, and I kept reaching into the bag to have another, and another, and another. If you want gourmet food, you want to play Super Mario World, where Nintendo applied the lessons they learned making Mario 3 to make much more logically-sound levels that have exploration highly incentivized.
Or you can play the E-Reader levels.
Yep, that’s the cape from Mario World. Yep, this is still Mario 3.
If you’re a Nintendo Switch Online expansion pack subscriber, you can play the E-Reader stages in Super Mario Advance 4, and trust me, they’re absolutely f*cking phenomenal. Well, 33 out of 38 of them, since the first five are just remakes of Mario 1’s World 1 and Level 2 – 2 because of-f*cking-course they would do that. If you want those to be fun, you have to make your own fun. I just flew around with the Mario World cape dive-bombing enemies out of spite. F*ck them.
Goomba: “Yep, this is going to hurt.”
Now don’t expect all of the E-Reader levels to offer some kind of hardcore white knuckle challenge. All of them have some kind of gimmick and several of them are just plain silly. But, they all remember to have fun. Okay, so maybe it IS a cinch to use the sticky blocks to run around a track. You just hold the B-button and forward on the D-Pad and watch the game beat itself with minimum effort, but that’s not the WHOLE stage. It’s there because that’s fun, and that should be all that matters. Even the weakest of the E-Reader stages are so damn charming in how out of f*cks they are about presenting any resistance when they could just have some toy for you to play with that they shoot the moon and becomes genius. Like at one point, a Boomerang Bros. shows up and he has a blue boomerang that, once you kill him, you get to pick up and throw at the next enemy. It happens once and never again and I LOVED IT!
I hope I didn’t just imply that some of the stages aren’t pretty tough, because THEY ARE. Most are middle of the road in terms of difficulty, but when the E-Reader levels show their teeth, they REALLY show their teeth.
Plus, nobody can accuse THESE levels of not wringing every drop of gameplay out of their real estate. The best way I can describe these stages is that they do for Super Mario Bros. 3 what the Special Zone stages in Super Mario World did for that game. This is the culmination of everything that has been learned by those who worked on these games saying “okay, let’s really show ’em what this engine can do.” As a result, the rough sloppiness of Mario 3’s level design is completely gone in these stages, replaced with fine-tuned level themes that very specifically require the players to explore. In fact, my absolute favorite levels of the core game, the ones that are mazes, are the main style of game in the E-Reader stages.
Oh it’s not just the items from Mario World that show up.
And even the gimmicky levels, like ones with timers so short that you only have 20 seconds, give players an actual reason to explore: the Advance Coins and the rarer e-Coins. I have no f*cking clue why these weren’t added to the core Mario Advance 4 game. Assuming they placed the coins in the right locations, and I have no reason to believe they wouldn’t have, it would have been transformative. I was constantly saying “what the f*ck was the point of having that entire section there?” That would have been off the table, but they didn’t do that and that’s pretty heartbreaking. When I did Mario Advance last week, I didn’t go for 100% of the post-game Yoshi Eggs. But, had they done the same kind of post-game bonus with Mario 3, I would still be playing Super Mario Advance 4 instead of writing this. I would have gone for 100% in the eighty-eight core levels just like I did with the thirty-eight E-Reader levels.
Oh, these stages are so good. They actually created space for 72 such stages. I wonder if, somewhere in the bowels of Nintendo’s archives, there’s even more of these waiting to be released.
That’s why, while I’m so happy I finally played Super Mario Bros. 3 for an IGC review, I also walk away feeling that it’s maybe the most overrated “all-time great” in terms of its actual content. It’s fine, but almost all my happiest moments came from playing the E-Reader levels. They felt more like the type of stages I would see in a Mario game from MY lifetime. I still think the core game isn’t as good as Mario 2 or Mario World. Not even close, and some of the ROM hacks I’ve played of Mario 3 annihilate it completely. So, why do older people tend to put this on such a pedestal? Is it really “you had to be there?” Well, yeah, but it’s much more complicated.
Okay, there’s SOME sloppiness. The Big Boo from Mario World returns a couple times in the E-Reader levels, but because you don’t have the ability to kick things upward in Mario 3’s engine like you can in Mario World, the fight is kind of janky.
I can’t imagine how big the leap from Super Mario Bros. 1 to Super Mario Bros. 3 must have felt for my older readers. Literally, I cannot, because there’s no comparison to anything in my gaming lifetime, especially since I just missed the jump from 2D to 3D. My gaming lifetime started in 1996, with the PS1, and really took off in 1998, when I got my Nintendo 64. If my parents had let me play Grand Theft Auto, then the jump from GTA 2 to GTA 3 would have been the Mario 1 to Mario 3 killer, but I was 10 and then 12 years old when those games came out and I wasn’t allowed to play them. My parents were afraid if I played the wrong kind of games, I’d become a cynical, foul-mouthed deviant. The results speak for themselves. Anyway, from a game design evolution point of view, I experienced a series of incremental steps forward. That’s kind of crazy when you think about how close I was to the dawn of games. I was only a decade late. Maybe a decade-and-a-half, but either way, I pretty much missed the age of big progress in game design entirely. And if you don’t think I’m so jealous of my older readers that they got to experience one gigantic leap forward after another that I want to swap their shoes with mouse traps, you’re wrong. You f*ckers were spoiled!
My favorite levels were almost always the fortresses. Anything that REQUIRED exploration and experimentation in Mario 3 was usually elite level design that holds up to the test of time.
But I also think those leaps might have made games seem better than they were. I’m not condescending my older readers, either. There’s actual science on this, and with games that make those gigantic leaps forward like Super Mario Bros. 3, it’s deeper than the simple nostalgia science of “Mario 3 is your favorite game because you played it as a child and didn’t have the burdens of adulthood weighing you down.” Oh no, it’s actually even more potent than that. Since the leap between Mario 1 and Mario 3 was so huge, it’s safe to say that Mario 3 was practically a whole new experience unlike anything you had experienced before. Agreed? Good. Well, get this: new experiences cause your brain to literally trip a sort of circuit breaker and go into a “recording” mode. And, of course, it does this with the brain’s favorite chemical: dopamine, which makes you even happier, which lights up even more neurons and gets them ready to record, which releases more dopamine, and so forth, and so forth. There’s actually a reason your brain is doing all this, too. Your brain is putting itself in a state for memories to form easier and last longer because it’s now operating under the assumption this new activity that you’re enjoying is one you will do again, so whatever you’re doing now, you’ll need to clearly remember what you did and how you did it so you can do it even better next time. Neat, huh? But consequently, anything similar that follows will lose that sense of “newness” so it won’t trigger the same reaction in your brain, and so you can NEVER replicate it. If you played Mario 3 when it was new in 1990, maybe that’s actually why nothing has felt quite as fun as it since. Your brain was literally configuring itself for almost all video games based on your experience playing Mario 3, and to assure that, it made you drunk on happiness. People my age aren’t looking down on you. We’re in the same boat with different games. For me, it was Banjo-Kazooie, Ocarina of Time, and Goldeneye.
The hammer suit in Super Mario Bros. 3 has to be one of the most overpowered items ever in a Mario game. It’s ridiculously effective, taking out too many otherwise impervious enemies like the ghosts and thwomps and dry bones. They can even kill Bowser directly. I imagine this is why it’s not until the last third of the game that you can get it “naturally.” I got my first hammer suit at the end of world six in this play session. Fun fact: if you don’t count Mario Maker games, the hammer suit is the only item in the Mario 3 to never be reissued in future Mario games. It’s the Black Lotus of Mario items.
Well, unfortunately for Super Mario Bros. 3, I had played games like Mario 3 before I played it. I even played Mario World before I played Mario 3. That’s why it felt like a step backwards. I can’t stress enough that I’m not hating on Mario 3. The base game, all by itself, is fine. I’d even give it the title of “Mario game with the best first world and best final world.” World 8 not only feels fantastic, but genuinely climatic. That’s harder to do than you would think. It’s a milestone in terms of scope and roster of characters. It shouldn’t just be studied by would-be game makers for introductory stages, but also for basic enemy design. It might be the most up-tempo 8-bit action game EVER. Needless to say, it would get a YES! even without the bonus E-Reader content. It’s kind of impossible to not like it. Also, nothing I can say is going to take away from Mario 3’s place in history. It’s in Cooperstown. Its star is on the Walk of Fame. Even among legends, it’s a big deal.
Seriously, even the flying beetles get an unforgettable bonus stage. By the way, the E-Reader content is now 22 years old. I really think Nintendo is sitting on a winning lottery ticket with bonus content for older games. The engines themselves are so flexible that Nintendo could make 33 of some of the best Mario stages ever decades after the fact. So, why quit at all? Seriously, if Nintendo announced tomorrow that they were putting out an expansion pack for Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past that added eight full-sized dungeons at a cost of $29.99, how many copies does the DLC pack sell? 500,000? A million? Two million? More? They could also use development of new content for old games as a way to train a new generation of designers on how to make “Nintendo-style” games, because that’s an art form I NEVER want to see lost, but it could happen. Big Shiggy Style, Tezuka, and the rest are aging-out. They’re not going to live forever, and neither are the people they already trained. But these older games are a proven stepping stone in learning how to make not just great video games, but timeless masterpieces. Such DLC will not eat into the profit of new games. Nobody is going to buy Link to the Past DLC in lieu of Breath of the Wild 3. They’ll buy both. It’s what Nintendo fans do, and they know that. New content for old games would ensure a brighter future for all of us. I want my nieces and nephew to have the quality of Nintendo games I have now when they’re senior citizens. Well, the best school for game design is the Nintendo catalog itself. By the way, a lot of people still think I’m a Nintendo hater. Do I really sound like one? Seriously?
Super Mario Bros. 3 is also a game where you can clearly feel the designer learning curve, and hell, I’d say it’s more obvious than even the original Super Mario Bros and probably the single roughest mainline “Super Mario” game ever made. They didn’t know exactly what they were doing yet, but they were getting better. You can even feel the progress as the game goes along with strong worlds like 5 and 7, and 8 really feeling like they’re putting it together and starting to get weird and experimental. And yet, you can also feel where they used the brakes just a little too much. So, I really hope my older readers aren’t offended when I say you probably liked Mario 3 more than “modern crap” because you were still developing as a person. But, here’s why that’s okay: because everything I dislike about Super Mario Bros. 3 is a result of the people who made it still developing as game designers. It’s Nintendo’s adolescence at its peak, where you can see that they’re going to go on to do some spectacular things, after they get done sprouting peach fuzz and popping zits. Verdict: YES!
Super Mario Advance Platform: Game Boy Advance First Released March 21, 2001 Directed by Toshiaki Suzuki Developed by Nintendo Available with a Switch Online Expansion Pack Subscription Listing on Mario Wiki
Oh, sweet Clawgrip. How did they ever do Doki Doki Panic without you?
I’ve already said everything I need to say about what masterpieces Super Mario Bros. 2 and Doki Doki Panic are. All that’s left is the game that introduced me to that world, which I first played in the wee hours of the morning following the GBA’s launch. I probably clicked-on my GBA at around one o’clock in the morning on June 11, 2001. At about 1:01 A.M. I was probably red in the face angry over how sh*tty the GBA screen was. It didn’t matter how many launch games I got, because I could only see two of them: this and ChuChu Rocket. It’s funny that I look back on 2001 with such fondness, because two of the three major launches SUCKED! My hands were too small to properly wield the Duke, and I couldn’t see the GBA’s screen. At least the Xbox issue was fixed by my father snagging an imported S-controller for me relatively quickly. Nothing could save the GBA though.
I wasn’t even into puzzle games during this era, but I liked the versus mode of ChuChu Rocket, which was the first console game I ever played with online play. Except it had seriously horrible, ruinous lag. That was fine. On Dreamcast, I played the hell out of this against CPU opponents, which is why I wanted a copy for my new portable game device. Would have been nice if I could have seen the screen. ChuChu Rocket, like Super Mario Advance, is pretty bright, but still not bright enough to overcome the GBA’s horrible original screen.
I was pissed because the game I had actually been hyped for, and the one that was the first game in my brand new Game Boy Advance, was Castlevania: Circle of the Moon. I can’t believe there’s apologists for the GBA screen, because I thought it was un-f*cking-playable. Circle of the Moon was clearly not fine-tuned for THAT screen. I’m actually certain the only explanation was the development team didn’t know the screen wouldn’t be backlit. Meanwhile, ChuChu Rocket was obsolete because I already had a version of it that I could, you know, actually see! I wanted ChuChu Rocket for car trips, but even in sunlight, I thought the screen sucked. So the only reason why the GBA’s launch wasn’t a complete letdown for me was Super Mario Advance. Even though I really enjoyed it, I had no idea what Super Mario Bros. 2 had actually accomplished. To my credit, I was still 11, about to turn 12.
If you want to be mean about it, you can steal Birdo’s bow. They should have had it get pissed and fire eggs like a machine gun if you do this.
In that original 2001 session, I remember thinking that Mario Advance was maybe the easiest video game I’d ever played up to that point. I’m pretty sure even back then I didn’t die more than a couple times, with world 5 – 1 and 7 – 2 being the only levels that got me more than once. I only remember one specific death: when the door came flying at me right before the Wart battle, I was so startled that the damn thing killed me. Otherwise, besides the odd jump to my death, I quickly got through Mario Advance, and while I enjoyed IT well enough, I enjoyed the squinting required to play it so much that my GBA went into a drawer, pretty much never to see the light of day again. I never got another new game for that model. I was excited for another installment of Pokemon, but when those came out, so did the GBA SP, and the Game Boy Player followed soon after. So really, the only game I ever played with my original GBA was this one, and while I really liked it a lot, it wasn’t exactly like it blew my mind. I think the reason it didn’t was entirely that f*cking screen.
The funny part of that story is that I had no idea that Nintendo had actually made this version of Super Mario Bros. 2 unfathomably easier than the already pretty damn easy NES original. How?
They added a third hidden mushroom in every stage, so now your max health is five.
Health refills are just sitting around pretty much everywhere.
Including inside boss chambers.
And you get health refills for every thrown object (be it an item or enemy) that results in a kill combo of two or more. The POW blocks are the exception to this.
Just the act of throwing the new giant Shy-Guy, even if you throw it at nothing, gives you a heart every throw, meaning every single appearance by them is basically a full life refill.
There’s significantly more enemies, which sounds like it should make the game harder, but instead, they’re there specifically to be combo victims. That means even more opportunities for health refills.
They’ve significantly increased the amount of weapons you can pluck from the ground.
And they added more weapons tailored towards mass destruction of the enemies.
They also added many more extra lives in the stages.
They made it so you can bet all your coins on a single spin of the slot machines, paying off tons of lives if you win.
A kill combo five gives you an extra life.
Plus you get an additional extra life for every enemy after five.
There’s just no way I can spin these decisions in a way that makes logical sense. This goes beyond simply nerfing Super Mario 2. This is like full-on baby proofing of a game to a level never before done, unless you count emulator stuff like save states and rewinding. If you manage to Game Over playing Super Mario Advance, you should seriously consider another hobby because this gaming thing just isn’t going to work out for you.
The Birdos especially get it bad, as there’s usually additional weapons in their chambers AND life refills.
Everything I disliked about Super Mario Advance as a soon-to-be 12 year old is still 100% accurate. I’ll tell you this: if you have a REALLY young child, you might want to consider this as the game to break them into platform games, or even gaming in general. I mean, it’s colorful, has a wide variety of levels and enemies, tons of stuff to do, memorable characters, satisfying bosses, controls like a dream, and it’s basically the most easy video game this side of playing Pong against someone with a broken paddle. If you’re a challenge seeker, there’s nothing here for you. Okay, so the whole “games an experience instead of a challenge” is my driving force, and was my driving force even back when I was 12. But there’s SOME limit to that. Games need to push-back. Mario Advance is the game that not only doesn’t push back, but it practically switches sides and pushes with you against itself.
It wouldn’t be until years after it launched that Mario Advance grew on me. I’d just finished Mario Galaxy and realized I’d never REALLY played Super Mario Advance 4: Super Mario Bros. 3. After that, apparently I still had to work Mario out of my system because I played Mario Advance 1 again. Back then I DID NOT replay games once I finished them. That just wasn’t something I ever did. But my Mario Advance experience had been tainted by Darko Nintendočić, so I popped it in my Game Boy Player. It was almost like it was divinely inspired, because I remember thinking “how did I never notice this game is f*cking brilliant?” I hadn’t aced the game the first go around and didn’t expect to this time, either. But I did. Every Advance Coin. Every Yoshi Egg. Okay, the Advance Coins weren’t THAT hard to find and neither are the Yoshi eggs. Why it matters is nabbing a 100% completion means playing EVERY level.
In a sense, the Yoshi egg hunt could be considered the game’s “hard mode” since the eggs replace two of the mushrooms. This would be swell, except they’re almost always hidden close by where the mushrooms they replaced were originally found. Plus you have to unlock the egg hunt by beating the game. Thankfully, you don’t need to nab every Advance Coin to do this, something I forgot. I wish I had just warped really quick to the end, but I didn’t. I beat the game with Mario, and realized quickly I didn’t want to get every egg again. I think I’ve overdosed on Mario 1 & 2 and need to move on.
In my first replay of Mario Advance, I enjoyed experiencing all twenty levels so much that I was crushed when I found out getting a 100% completion didn’t unlock more content. I was blown away by how all twenty of them feel completely unique from each-other, and how playing them with each character also changes the, for lack of a better term, personality of each level. I came to realize that they really went all-out on the layouts and enemy design and fine tuning the controls for the characters. Mind you, it wouldn’t be until decades later, when I played Doki Doki Panic, that I realized how truly fine-tuned it actually is. I think that actually speaks volumes about how good Super Mario Bros. 2 is that so many people who love it are completely unaware that the version they’re playing isn’t even the game at its most idealized.
I swear to God, the first time I played the NES version of Super Mario Bros. 2, I had no clue there was no Robo-Birdo. When I got to the end of World 3 and another Mouser was waiting for me, my heart sank. I really thought the game was going to alternate between Mouser and Tryclyde until the Wart battle. This is such a fantastic boss battle that I think it sucks they didn’t replace the second Mouser with a second new boss. Maybe for the next remake, Nintendo? I’m kidding. Please don’t remake this again. Make a brand new game with this type of gameplay.
I first played Super Mario Advance as a soon-to-be 12 year old. Now I’m a soon-to-be 36 year old, and like so many things in life, my opinion on Mario Advance has changed dramatically over the years. Of the four versions of Mario 2 (not counting BS Super Mario USA, a modified version of the Super Mario 2 found in Super Mario All-Stars that made for the Satellaview, which isn’t even the full game), Mario Advance I’d put third, with only the version found in Super Mario All-Stars behind it. It’s still an amazing experience. Veterans of Mario 2 or even Doki Doki Panic can enjoy playing “spot the difference.” with the subtle changes made to level layouts or enjoy one of the easiest collect-a-thons ever made. I did one single full playthrough for this review and I got 99 out of 100 coins.
Son of a bitch. Forgot one f*cking coin in World 3 – 1 and somehow never noticed. Yes, I went back and got it. You can collect the coins in the Yoshi Challenge. Unfortunately, by the time I unlocked that, I was too burned out on Super Mario 2 to go get all the eggs.
But, I do question why they took such extreme measures towards lowering the difficulty. It’s almost unprecedented in the history of gaming. The irony is Doki Doki Panic became one of the biggest games in the entire history of the medium because the original Super Mario Bros. 2 was too hard, yet they subtracted from its difficulty in Super Mario Bros. 2 USA. But that version still does little things that prevent you from going on complete cruise control, like having you be committed to a single character every stage. Pick someone not as suitable for a level? Tough sh*t, and in retrospect, I’m fine with that. But then they removed even that from the Super Mario All-Stars version, which allows you to swap every life. (shrug) That’s why, as much as I love Super Mario Bros. 2 and even Mario Advance, I really hope they don’t remake it again, because what’s left to nerf at this point? Have it literally rain hearts? Have enemies surrender on sight? When you pull Birdo’s bow off, the brain spurts out of a hole? Get to Wart’s chamber only to find him dead with an empty can of V8 laying next to him? Verdict: YES!
It’s my little blog’s anniversary! Thank you everyone for fourteen incredible years! I love you all! For keeps!
All Night Nippon: Super Mario Bros. Platform: Famicom Disk System Released December 20, 1986 Developed by Nintendo Published by Fuji Television Never Released Outside of Japan NEVER BEEN RE-RELEASED Listing at Mario Wiki
Yume Kōjō: Doki Doki Panic Platform: Famicom Disk System Released July 10, 1987 Directed by Kensuke Tanabe Developed by Nintendo Published by Fuji Television Never Released Outside of Japan NEVER BEEN RE-RELEASED Listing at Mario Wiki
The 1up trick: masochists edition.
Between 1986 and 1987, Fuji Television and the Nippon Broadcasting System partnered with Nintendo for two games, one of which is fairly inconsequential, and the other is, well, consequential. Before there was Doki Doki Panic, there was All Night Nippon: Super Mario Bros. It’s based on a popular radio program called All Night Nippon that dates back to 1967 and still runs to this day. It’s a cultural institution in Japan on the level of, say, Saturday Night Live here in the United States. Hell, BIGGER than SNL, actually. So big that people lined up for days to snag one of the limited 1,000 copies that would be sold of this on December 20, 1986. Two-thousand copies were won by people who sent postcards to the station, while a pair of gaming magazines each gave away twenty copies, bringing the grand total to 3,040 total copies and making it a cherished collector’s item today that fetches $1,000 or more a copy on the open market. For a ROM hack. Hmph.
The Toads are replaced with the hosts, who were arguably among the biggest celebrities in Japan at the time.
Okay, so it’s not just a Super Mario Bros. 1 with the Goombas, Piranha Plants, and Toads replaced by the hosts of All Night Nippon. Three stages from the coin-op Vs. Super Mario Bros. and three stages from Super Mario Bros.: The Lost Levels were substituted for six other levels in the standard Super Mario 1 roster of thirty-two stages. Hell, level 8 – 4 is level 8 – 4 from Lost Levels. Additionally, the graphics are mostly taken from the original Japanese Super Mario Bros. 2, with some small alterations to add a bit of a radio theme to a few bushes. There’s really only one reason to seek out this build of Super Mario and that’s the ability to play as Luigi, with all his quirks from Super Mario Bros. 2, in a game that’s mostly made out of Super Mario 1 stages. It makes for a genuinely fun novelty. For about twenty minutes, but hell, how much more Super Mario 1 can you possibly want? All Night Nippon: Super Mario Bros. Verdict: YES!
You can hit that question mark from a standing flat jump off the ground. Alright, go have fun cheesing (most) of the original game with Luigi’s jump. Not that it matters. The odds of this thing ever getting a re-release are probably lower than even something like Michael Jackson’s Moonwalker.
Okay, okay. Nobody came here to read about an obscure version of Super Mario 1 so let’s get to Doki Doki Panic. When the original version of Super Mario Bros. 2 was sent to America, a guy named Howard Phillips (aka the guy from Nintendo Power magazine’s Howard & Nester), who was basically the best gamer on Nintendo of America’s staff, is credited with convincing NOA that it was too similar to the original game and too hard for American audiences and they should just ask for something else.
By this point, Nintendo of America knew Super Mario 3 was coming, but they didn’t want to waste at least a year waiting for it. Nintendo was arguably the hottest property in America and they knew they would need a lot more Mario to keep the NES’ momentum going. Instead of making a new game from the ground-up, they decided to take a game that was developed as part of a promotional event held by Fuji Television that was kind of like a World’s Fair or a carnival, replace the theme of masks with Mario-themed stuff, and swap out the Arabian-themed main characters created for the event with Mario, Luigi, Toad, and the Princess. If you want to know more, the Video Game Historian has you covered. I want to talk about the gameplay.
Despite looking like the character that evolved into Mario, Papa is actually the character that became Toad. By the way, due to the flashiness of exploding bombs and the speed at which the water is animated, I had to take full precautions playing Doki Doki Panic. I don’t advise this game for people who are photosensitive.
Doki Doki Panic might look exactly like Super Mario Bros. 2, but in terms of gameplay, this might actually still be the best build of it. Lately, I’ve been on a “games as a challenge” versus “games as an experience” kick. Lucky me that Doki Doki Panic and Super Mario Bros. 2, two versions of one game, exemplifies the difference between those two mindsets. I’ll be reviewing Super Mario Advance next (it’s up, click here), which is almost certainly the better EXPERIENCE. They added a lot of content, including a new boss and new stuff to find, plus it looks fantastic. But it’s also not exactly the most challenging game. In fact, you might look at the ability of Luigi and Princess Peach and shake your head, because they’re so clearly overpowered that they nullify entire segments of the game. Well, actually THEY don’t, but what you can do with them in Super Mario Bros. 2 does. Doki Doki Panic was NEVER meant to have B-running and jumping. The addition of that alone fundamentally changes the entire game experience for literally all four characters.
Besides B-running, the biggest missing element from Super Mario 2 is Clawgrip the Crab. Instead, you fight a third Mouser at the end of World 5. Since the Clawgrip fight is fantastic and the Mouser fight is the same one you’ve already done twice, only spongier, this was the right call. Nintendo would later change Super Mario Advance’s boss order, adding a new Robo-Birdo fight to the end of world three, but instead of doing a new boss for the end of world six, not only did they dump the second Tryclyde fight but they replaced him with Mouser. Sigh.
Now, I already love Super Mario Bros. 2. It’s my favorite 2D Mario game (well, unless you count ROM hacks) and it’s clearly a milestone in level design. Seriously, the twenty stages found in this game, each offering unique platforming challenges, are some of the most well designed Nintendo ever did in 8-bits. But, I also acknowledge it’s a very problematic game thanks to the ability to circumvent so much of that elegant level design by just B-running to higher platforms. Well, you can’t do that sh*t in Doki Doki Panic, and it’s transformative. Now, you have to make use of the FULL level layouts. Almost every single platform matters for at least one character. A door is well above your head? Better start stacking blocks or hitching a ride on an enemy. Want to make it across that waterfall? You’ll need every log or fish to do it, especially if you’re using Imajin (Mario) or Papa (Toad).
Peach’s floating trick obviously covers a lot less ground, and if you have it activated, any enemy who touches you will damage you. You have to let go of the jump button to be able to stand on enemies. Smart.
Yes, Lina (Princess Peach) and Mama (Luigi) can still use their abilities to bypass SOME relatively small sections (and the Luigi proxy’s jump somehow feels floatier but that might be just an illusion because of the sprite’s animation), but you’ll still need to actually use most of the terrain most of the time. Playing Doki Doki Panic is revealing of what a truly generational masterpiece Super Mario Bros. 2 is. You really do have to play this version of the game to appreciate how fine-tuned the levels are. Platforms that made no sense in Super Mario 2 are essential to finishing Doki Doki Panic, and thus the challenge is significantly increased. Mario 2’s difficulty scaling feels pretty wonky. Doki Doki scales much more naturally. By the way, if it sounds like the game’s pace is significantly slower, while it might be technically true, it never really feels like it. Weird, right? But it’s true because you’re having to pay closer attention. Slower movement doesn’t matter because Doki Doki has a faster happenings-tempo.
Like these things here? I didn’t get a picture of it, but there’s a moment during this sequence where you have a small space to build up a duck-jump that you have to do WHILE moving and WHILE dodging an enemy. It has no stakes at all in Mario 2 if you hold the B button down. Here, only the Luigi character can skip the ducking part.
Okay, so you can’t completely recreate the experience with a US copy just by avoiding running. There’s other small changes. Like, you know how satisfying it is to throw an enemy and have their dead body take out the next four or five enemies? That doesn’t work in Doki Doki Panic. While items like the vegetables can still take out multiple baddies, thrown enemies only kill the first enemy they make contact with. That doesn’t make that big a difference. There’s no sections built around the combo technique, probably because it was never meant to be a thing. You also don’t shrink when you’re down to your final hit and some of the enemy attack patterns are slightly modified. But, yeah, you’ll get 95% of the Doki Doki experience just by stopping yourself from using B-running. Give it a try!
Right up until the final two levels, you still feel the difference and might find your finger reaching for that B-button only to say “oh right!” I just beat Doki Doki Panic four times today and I was still doing it right up until the bitter end.
Also, similar to how you have to beat Lost Levels eight times to see everything, you have to beat Doki Doki Panic once with all four characters to unlock the “true ending.” While I would never have enjoyed putting that much work into the version of Super Mario Bros. 2 Japan got, I had no problem doing that with their quirky little FDS game that eventually became the whole world’s Super Mario Bros. 2. I have to assume someone at Nintendo, around the time Doki Doki Panic finished development, said “why the f*ck did we waste this on Fuji Television?” And it would have been a good question, because up to that point, I don’t think Nintendo had ever made a better game. I might enjoy the experience of playing Super Mario Advance more, but Doki Doki Panic is still the best all-encompassing package this specific game ever got. The version that offers both an experience and a challenge.
For all the credit Super Mario 1 gets, Doki Doki Panic feels like it takes the platforming genre in an even bolder direction. You can remove the timer and make a possibly slower exploration-based adventure that still retains all the tricky jumping and satisfying combat fans want out of the genre. Doki Doki Panic represented a leap in design logic that left gaming better for everyone. Will it ever get a re-release? I’d hope that Nintendo and Fuji Television could work something out. It’s been almost forty years and it’s the most important re-spriting in gaming history. Sure, we celebrate Super Mario Bros. 2 today, but that doesn’t mean we celebrate Doki Doki Panic at the same time. Instead, it’s been relegated to the status of being an answer to a trivia question. A historic footnote and nothing more, and I think that’s tragic. Really, you can play any version of this game and have a lot of fun, but you can only play one version that still does that while putting up a fight, and that’s Doki Doki Panic. Yume Kōjō: Doki Doki Panic Verdict: YES!
Don’t worry, Wart. The rest of them won’t show up again, either.
Super Mario Bros. 2 aka The Lost Levels Platform: Famicom Disk System, SNES FDS Original First Released June 3, 1986 Super Mario All-Stars Released July 14, 1993 Directed by Shigeru Miyamoto & Takashi Tezuka Developed by Nintendo Both Available with Switch Online Subscription (Standard)
Listings on Mario Wiki: Famicom Disk System – Super Mario All-Stars
Super Mario Bros. 2 (1986 – Famicom Disk)
Super Mario All-Stars (1993 – SNES)
Super Mario All-Stars (1993 – SNES)
Does the “bounce off the turtle shell for easy 1ups” trick seen above count as cheating? If the answer is “no” then I just beat the infamous Super Mario Bros.: The Lost Levels twice in one day without cheating. Sort of. I also didn’t warp, but one time in each version, I would have warped if I hadn’t rewound the game. Since a full tour of all the levels requires you not to warp, and since I had no intention to replay these once I was done, I used rewind to take me back to the start of the branching path. But that’s it. If I died or lost my power-up, I didn’t undo it. Now, at the start of this process, I didn’t intend to play the original FDS version as anything more than a sampling. In the original Famicom Disk Version, if you want to see four out of the five bonus worlds, you have to beat the game an absolutely ridiculous EIGHT TIMES. On Super Mario All-Stars, they’re lumped-in with the ninth world that you get for not warping. Besides, I was certain I would be miserable playing Lost Levels. I wasn’t, and thus:
Oh I didn’t beat the game eight times. I’m not that insane. Also, my FDS session came after I’d already beat the game with Mario on Super Mario All-Stars. One thing became really clear when I played the game with Luigi: the overwhelming majority of Lost Levels’ challenge is based around Mario, and only Mario. The only real difference in movement physics between Super Mario 1 and Super Mario 2 is that this game introduced the concept of Mario springing off enemies. It’s not as dramatic as it would eventually become, but Mario 2 is clearly the prototype for that gameplay concept. If that’s not the tough stuff, the sheer amount of long jumps and single-block platforms is.
Oh I died here. Damn turtle needed to be a little higher.
But all those jumping challenges were designed with Mario in mind. Platforms or long jumps that you need a running jump for with Mario can typically be handled by Luigi with a lot less effort. Luigi jumps a lot higher and a lot further, so unless there’s a low ceiling, he nerfs most of the tough jumps from the Mario side of the adventure. Luigi’s biggest drawback is how far he slides before coming to a stop when you use the B-run. Most of my deaths with Mario were from shorting jumps. Most of my deaths with Luigi were from some form of sliding, mostly off the edge of platforms. But, I had a much easier time adjusting to Luigi’s quirks than Mario’s shortcomings.
♫ Fly through the stage, Cathy! Zoom, zoom, zoom! Forgot for a second it’s not the thing to do! Lost another life sliding! Boo hoo hoo! This ain’t the red plumber! It’s a different hue! Luigi’s traction doesn’t stop like glue and I skid to my doom my darling!
One other thing became clear while playing this: I was wrong about Super Mario Bros. 2 or Lost Levels or Super Mario for Super Players or whatever else you want to call it. I always dismissed it as a glorified ROM hack, no different than any of the hundreds of fan-made ones of the original Super Mario Bros. I wasn’t entirely wrong, but I wasn’t entirely right, either. Yes, it’s just a mod of the original game with some changes to background graphics and a new whammy: the poison mushroom. I think the poison mushroom is a flop that only works the first time IF you don’t already know it’s coming. Once you adjust to it, it’s not that hard to just not pick it up even if you spring one from a question mark block. More problematic are the red piranha plants. Normally, the plants become shy if you stand next to the pipe, but the red ones require you to be ON the pipe to trigger their bashfulness.
They also added wind, but I didn’t think it was that big a deal. I didn’t lose more lives than average because of it. It’s not unpredictable. It’s just another fixture. Part of the level design. Hell, if anything, I welcomed it when it showed up because it broke up the monotony of playing more of the same with Super Mario Bros. I wish it had more gimmicks like that. It was certainly better than the green springs. They launch you so high into the sky that you can’t even see where you are. Well, except you can use the scrolling to aim. There’s two stages built entirely around them that both feel nearly identical. Launch off the spring, clear a massive gap, land on the next spring, or maybe it’s a small platform. They weren’t very hard, and I honestly didn’t remember losing a single life on either version. Actually I did lose one but it’s because I got greedy and tried to make it further than I realistically could.
This is the one I died on.
For all the hoopla of how hard Lost Levels was supposed to be, thanks to the 1-up trick (which is literally possible right at the start of level 1 – 1), I never came that close to a game over. The stages are hard but not insurmountable. I only timed-out once on one of the castle mazes. I only dropped ten lives or more in a single stage twice, and never when playing as Luigi. Hell, I was acing levels even late in the game. It’s tough and there’s a lot of trial and error, but once you get a feel for the design logic, it’s not that bad. Like, if a jump seems TOO impossible, chances are there’s invisible blocks around to provide some kind of assist or boost. That’s the part I was wrong about. It might be a glorified ROM hack, but there is a predictable method to the madness. Once I approached Lost Levels as a challenge of my gaming skills instead of as a gaming experience, it’s kind of an exciting game.
Really, just the act of taking your time should reduce the difficulty by 50%. I think a lot of the moaning is probably based on how quickly players are able to run through Super Mario 1. It’s one of the most speed-run games in history. But for Lost Levels, I noticed the more I paced myself, the fewer attempts I needed to beat a stage.
Where the game still feels kind of janky is in the difficulty scaling. One thing that the original Super Mario Bros. got right was the progression of the challenge. Well, that’s out the door here. Lost Levels has a difficulty curve that resembles a heart monitor. One of the levels I dropped more than ten lives on was 4 – 3, which it turns out is actually a cut & paste from the coin-op version of the original game, Vs. Super Mario Bros. Okay, that’s kind of funny, especially since I’m pretty sure that was the stage I died the most on. But then I breezed through worlds five and six and even got my first fire flower in a few worlds, which I still had to use against world six’s Bowser. Now, some of that can be chalked up to adapting to the types of challenges in the game. But certainly not all of it can be.
By the way, I was STUNNED by how easy World 9 was, though it seems that was meant as a kind of reward and a winking nod to the minus world from the original game by the development team. The color scheme for world 9 is especially weird on the Famicom Disk. It’s worth mentioning that the FDS version has an additional twist for world 9: you only get one life. Don’t worry though, because it’s not THAT tough as long as you remember to jump on the ceiling during the home stretch of 9 – 4.
But, to the shock of my friends, I had fun on Saturday playing this. Lost Levels became one of those games that I thought I’d knock out in a morning and instead I played it for the better part of a day and never really got bored. Okay, the whole “beat the game eight times to get the final four hidden worlds” thing is ridiculous, but future re-releases dumped that. I think Nintendo made a big mistake not bringing this out in America in the 80s. They really underestimated gamers. There’s people who beat games blindfolded, and they vetoed making millions off this because there’s a poison mushroom near the start of the first stage? Really? Oh, I’m totally fine with our version of Super Mario Bros. 2 getting the “#2” label, but if Nintendo was worried about alienating the fan base by releasing such a hard game, don’t call this Mario 2. Call it “More Super Mario Bros.” or something like that.
Skid to my doom……
….. my darling!
Lost Levels is actually very modern in many ways. I know I’ve said a lot of games feel like DLC packs, but in the case of Super Mario Bros.: The Lost Levels, it REALLY feels like a prototype for modern DLC. It wouldn’t be hard to make this even more modern. Replace the lives system with a death counter and maybe a clock for speed runners and Lost Levels could pass for a 2025 design. So, yeah, I was wrong about Lost Levels, kind of. I really don’t think it’s for EVERYONE. If you’re not specifically seeking a challenge for your platforming skills, don’t bother. Nothing new it offers over Super Mario Bros. is worth the suffering you’ll experience, and that’s before I even consider that most of the elegance of the original game is lost. But if you want an often clever platforming challenge that maintains the purity of Super Mario 1, then I’d say Lost Levels is worth dying for again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again…………. Verdict: YES!
Super Mario Bros. Deluxe Platform: Game Boy Color Released May 10, 1999 Directed by Toshiaki Suzuki Developed by Nintendo NO MODERN RELEASE Listing at Mario Wiki
Yes, this is as cool as it looks.
Want to play the best-selling classic version of a Mario game that isn’t currently on Switch Online? Well, here it is. Even though fourteen years had passed and everyone and their dog had probably already played Super Mario Bros. to death, Super Mario Bros. Deluxe sold a whopping five million copies on the Game Boy Color. Yeesh. One of those copies was purchased by my father with the intent to give it to his favorite daughter for her tenth birthday. But then Angela didn’t show up until 2010 so he gave it to me instead. And I…… never played it. Well, let me clarify: I threw it on for like fifteen minutes, but I had Pokemon to catch, and besides, there was an NES in our house. In fact, my pops had that NES longer than he’d had my mother. If I were to play Super Mario Bros. (and eventually I did), I’d rather play it on the NES than on this cramped-ass screen. Look how much is cut off:
Super Mario Bros. (1985 – NES)
Super Mario Bros. Deluxe (1999 – Game Boy Color)
But the truth is I never would have played it anyway. I was not into old games and that’s all there was to it. There were some exceptions of course like Castlevania or Wizards & Warriors (and the latter was because I was killing time waiting for a new console releasing THAT NIGHT, the Dreamcast) but at that age? I was downright hostile towards any game released before I got into gaming, and I’m ashamed to admit that I remained that way well into my twenties. Today I’m just a couple weeks away from turning 36 years old and, according to Feedspot, I have the second best retro gaming website/blog in the world (UpdateFebruary 2026: I’ve somehow fallen to #23 despite the fact that my page views have gone up even more since this review. Shrug). Go figure, right? The only comfort I take from looking back on my attitude is that I clearly wasn’t some kind of exceptional brat, because the kids in my life now are the same way I was. Sometimes I catch them in the right mood and they’re eager to help Aunt Cathy with a review that I need a co-op partner or versus opponent for, but for the most part with the older games, even the good ones, they’d rather be playing anything else. That doesn’t make them brats. No, they’re snobs, and I was one of them.
The swimming stages are why I couldn’t excuse Super Adventure Island. Unless you want to count Jungle Hunt, this is the first platformer with swimming stages, and if ANY game with swimming stages could get away with at least one basic straight line map where you swim right until you reach a goal, it’s Super Mario Bros. But there’s not a single straight line swimming level in the entire game. Even Super Mario’s most basic swimming stages have suction holes and hard surfaces to swim around, plus one of the great unsung basic enemy designs in gaming history: the Blooper squids. They have the perfect attack pattern to create an element of danger for the swimming mechanics. Level 2 – 2 all by itself makes Super Adventure Island’s two swimming stages look cynical and lazy, because, you know, they are.
Okay, so I’m still not the biggest fan of Super Mario Bros. even though I’m embarrassed, even ashamed, of my past attitude towards retro gaming. But, if 10 year old me had ever bothered to finish a full cycle of levels for Super Mario Deluxe, I think I would have enjoyed a lot of the bonus content. The main game? Not so much. Oh, I’m not going to argue that it’s a bad game. It’s not. It saved video games from the Crash of ’83 for a reason. It’s fantastic. But this is NOT the way to play it unless you’re playing it in the 2000s on a Game Boy Color. The screen is too cramped, and even though some elements were slightly modified to account for that, it’s still the same game as it was in 1985, only formatted for the Game Boy Color’s smaller dimensions. It matters a lot, actually.
Like this, which you get a LOT less warning on.
I won’t argue that every stage suffers from the smaller screen. Hell, a few are even enhanced by it. The bridges with the flying Cheep-Cheeps, for example. The cramped screen adds to the tension. But those benefits are significantly outweighed by the cost to the elegant platforming and enemy attack patterns. For example, the Hammer Bros. jumping moves are ruined by the smaller screen. The dungeon levels especially suffer badly from having less space to measure your jumps. You can scroll the screen up and down, but it’s not just an up or down problem. Super Mario reignited gaming because of how precise the levels are made. The jumps. The enemy placement. So much of that is lost when it takes longer to scroll those elements into existence.
Level 8 – 3 is one of the few stages that benefits from the smaller playfield. That’s mostly because it doesn’t have platforming. It’s oriented like an avoider, which inherently lends itself to the more compact screen.
If this doesn’t sound worthy of the “Deluxe” stamp, it’s really not. That comes from all the extra content, but even that isn’t perfect. Going into this review, I intended to play EVERYTHING in Deluxe, including the Lost Levels, aka Super Mario Bros. 2: The Original Japanese Version. If you score 300,000 points in the main mode, you unlock it. In Deluxe, it’s called “Super Mario Bros. For Super Players” but it’s Lost Levels. Except, it’s not ALL of Lost Levels. It only has the first eight worlds. Fans will note that both the Japanese game and the version contained in Super Mario All-Stars has thirteen worlds. Well, like the original Super Mario Bros. 2, they have to be unlocked, right? Nope. There’s no way to play the missing five worlds in Deluxe. Since I really don’t want to play through these stages twice in order to see them all, I decided to opt out after a couple stages and, instead, I’ll review this version of them very soon:
Thank God that Mario Deluxe has more than just that. There’s two stand-out modes that make this worth a look. The first is “challenge mode” which presents players with three specific extra challenges for the thirty-two main levels of the original game. I’ve always enjoyed collecting mechanics, and challenge mode is what convinced me this could be worth re-releasing or adding to the Switch Online service. The first task in each stage is to find five red coins. These could be hidden in blocks, or at the tail-end of a 10-coin block. Some are moderately well hidden but I never struggled all that much to snag all five. However, most of the red coins were satisfying enough to snag.
Some coins you have to look for. Others are just placed wherever they have room. Not every level really lends itself to the challenge mode’s style.
The second challenge is to score a target amount of points, and the target isn’t just some token number. They fine-tuned the score to be challenging enough that I couldn’t just breeze through it. Even when I realized that I needed to try to always get all six fireworks at the end of levels, I still found myself coming short a lot. More than once, I finished exactly one coin’s point value short of reaching the goal. Weirdly, I never got frustrated when this happened. It was fun enough that I wanted to keep trying to get it.
Finally, challenge mode features a hidden Yoshi egg somewhere in each stage. Now these are the real tricky ones to find because they’re always in invisible blocks. In theory, they could be anywhere. In practice, there’s a clear logic to where they’re hidden, so it doesn’t feel like they just stuck the things in arbitrary locations. Even armed with that awareness, it often took me a couple minutes at least to find the egg, and I was ALWAYS happy when I did. This is a great mode that’s worth a look.
Okay, that Yoshi egg is really bad looking. It just sticks out like a sore thumb. By the way, there’s a versus mode that I couldn’t test.
The final gameplay option was easily the highlight of my play session with Deluxe: You VS. Boo, which unlocks at 100,000 points. Unlike the previous challenges, these aren’t modified versions of Super Mario’s existing levels. This mode features eight all-new levels, and with those new levels comes several new gameplay mechanics. The idea is you’re racing a Boo to the flagpole. The Boo can pass through solid objects, but it doesn’t hurt you to touch it. Along the way, you’ll encounter Face Blocks that activate or deactivate blocks that can create roadblocks OR become valuable platforms. As you race, Boo has the ability to activate the blocks in a way that screws you. There’s also numbered blocks that work like the face blocks, only they’re triggered automatically after counting down. And yes, if your timing and Boo’s timing are in sync, you can absolutely screw yourself because Boo hit the switch before you completed your jump.
There’s also a new kind of spring block and spiked blocks that become solid blocks. What makes this REALLY work is that all eight of these levels feature exceptionally fantastic level design. Seriously, these are some of the strongest levels in the entire Mario catalog. What I hate is how little weight is given to the racing scores themselves. As far as I could tell, the game doesn’t keep track of your time, at least in a way the player can see it. You have to use the countdown timer and keep track of it yourself. Well, except for the fact that, if you rematch the Boo on the same course, his next time will change relative to how well you did the last race. If you do well enough, he’ll even change colors. The one you want to unlock is the black Boo since that indicates the fastest times.
So yes, Nintendo probably should include Super Mario Bros. Deluxe in the Switch Online lineup. There’s some content here that’s worth a look. I can’t stress enough how much I enjoyed the Boo racing, but the collect-a-thon had its charms, too. I’d even say this content by itself earned the “deluxe” title. BUT, if I had to choose between uploading this cramped-screen Game Boy Color version OR creating a whole new version of Super Mario Deluxe that uses the full dimensions. I’d rather have the new remake. Super Mario Bros. just plain isn’t made for this aspect ratio. I guess the Boo race feels optimized for it. I mean, kinda, but I’m pretty sure it would be better in full-screen as well. What I’m even more frustrated with is that in 1999, 10 year old me brushed-off Mario Deluxe as just an old game. If only I had actually played it, who knows? Maybe I’d have the #1 ranked site. Verdict: YES!
Hey, let’s get my fortune read!
I’m pretty sure that’s a weather report, not a fortune.
Milon’s Secret Castle aka Meikyuu Kumikyoku: Miron no Daibouken Platform: Nintendo Entertainment System, Game Boy NES Version Released November 13, 1986
Game Boy Version Released March 26, 1993 Developed by Hudson Soft NO MODERN RELEASE
The lightning bolt to the left of me damaged me before the game handed me back control of the character. Things like this happened CONSTANTLY throughout both my play sessions with the NES version of the game. If it wasn’t outside the castle, I would exit a shop in one of the stages and literally, as soon as the character spawned, I would hear the DONG of getting life slapped by an enemy that I literally could not have avoided. You would think this should, by itself, assure a NO! verdict. But it’s a lot more complicated than that.
At times, Milon’s Secret Castle is one of those abstract treasure hunt games that you need a guide for, unless you want to spend the next week jumping around while trying to figure out what item does what thing. Let me assure you this isn’t as bad as, say, Vs. The Goonies where stuff is hidden in completely arbitrary locations and must be collected by performing completely arbitrary button inputs that nobody should have ever been able to suss out. Seriously, when I read a guide to a game like Goonies, I assume one of two things happened. Either the developers leaked the locations of the hidden stuff or someone out there wasted their once-in-a-generation brain on video games instead of quantum physics and set humanity back a century in the process. Thinking about that sh*t leaves me unable to sleep sometimes. “Well, we’ll never figure out how to make a warp drive in my lifetime, but at least we have a full walk-through for Tower of Druaga.” And then comes the crying.
Out of the many, many hints, maybe one or two actually helped. This is not one of them.
While Milon isn’t as extreme as those games, I also can’t imagine being able to play it without a guide. The idea is you’re supposed to hop around a series of rooms while shooting every hard surface with bubbles. Some of the walls and floors might be hiding money under them. There’s also hidden shops, hidden honeycombs (which increase your health by a single meter), and occasionally the Hudson bee, which grants you a shield. But, there are no key items hidden in the blocks. Until the end of the third world, all those have to be purchased in stores. Enemies don’t drop currency, so there’s only two ways to get cash. One is to find it in the rooms. The catch there is once you’ve collected a money tile, it never comes back. There’s a single room on the game’s third world (well, third floor) where, for whatever reason, some (but not all) of the money tiles respawn. It’s this room:
NES
Game Boy
When I played the NES game, I was certain this was some kind of glitch that wasn’t deliberate. But, that room gets a refill on the Game Boy version too. So, if you do want to grind, that’s eventually an option at around the halfway mark of the game. The other method is to enter the bonus rooms. There’s one hidden within each of the seven “normal” rooms in the game that you have to find by Mario-bonking blocks instead of shooting them. Find the right block and it reveals a music box. Touch the music box to enter the bonus room. In them, you have to collect music notes that fly up onto the screen. Notes are worth one point, sharps (they look like hash marks) are worth two, while flat notes (they look a lowercase b), subtract a point. You get $1 for every four points you get, unless you get 50, at which point the payout doubles. I never did this once on the NES even when I tried to cheat it. On the Game Boy, I did it twice without the need for emulation tomfoolery. That’s because on the NES version, the movement physics change in the bonus rooms, becoming slow to respond to your inputs, something that doesn’t happen on the Game Boy.
NES
Game Boy
I kind of wish that Milon ditched the bonus rooms and the ability to grind the stone room, because early in the game, the hunt for money was actually pretty damn fun, as were my searches for the doors to the shops. The titular castle serves as the overworld. The doors aren’t numbered, nor are you prevented from returning to any level. When I attempted to play without a guide, I found myself enjoying shooting all the various walls, smiling with delight when I finally found a buck or two I missed the first time. There’s a nice little “puff” effect when you find a destructible tile, which also carries over to the Game Boy version.
It also does the “tease stuff that you can’t reach now but will be able to eventually” trope a couple times, though never as successfully as, say, a Zelda game.
Technically you’re locked into every room and have to locate a key before being allowed out. This mechanic wasn’t as successful as the other treasure hunting aspects. I don’t remember ever struggling to find a key. What could have made it work is having the key and the exit move around every time you reenter a stage, but actually, once you have a room’s key, you never need to find it again. However, you do need to reactivate the hidden doors. This is one of many areas where the Game Boy version falters. Making the invisible doors visible was never an issue on the NES. If anything, it felt like it was too easy. On the Game Boy, the collision box on the hidden doors must be pretty damn small because I could shoot the correct tile and sometimes it didn’t appear. Which actually is in line with all the other problems the Game Boy port has with doors. More on that later.
NES
Game Boy
What’s most remarkable is that, despite the repetitive enemy and boss design, each room in Milon’s Secret Castle feels distinct. It’s not just the color schemes, either. It’s the general architecture of the rooms. The layouts. No new room feels even a little close to being like any previous one until a pair of twin rooms near the end of the game. Given the time frame and the limitations of the NES/Famicom in 1986, that’s an amazing achievement that I wasn’t expecting going into this review. It certainly helps with the exploration, as well. Unless you use a strategy guide, you’ll no-doubt miss things and have to backtrack, but you should be able to know which room is which. Plus, it just makes for a better game because it’s hard to get bored when every room feels like a new experience.
So, what’s the problem? You mean besides the fact that both games are riddled with technical problems? Because that’s not a nothingburger. On the NES, you can.. and will.. be damaged by enemies when the game is caught in an animation of you entering and exiting a castle door. You are NOT invincible when the game mechanics take over. It’s certain to happen at least a couple times in a typical session and I even ate a GAME OVER from it at one point. On the Game Boy, it happens a lot less. In fact, I only had this happen once, but the delay between the act of being damaged and registering the damage was jaw-dropping. Still, it seems like the Game Boy should be the stronger version of the two. It had an extra seven years to fix all the problems, right? Well……….
SPLIT DECISION: GAME BOY VERSION
The Game Boy version of Milon’s Secret Castle is a direct port of the NES game, but it does have some advantages. Money is easier to come by, some items are cheaper (the thing that doubles the damage of your bubbles especially), bosses can only shoot one projectile at a time (this might be a negative if you want more challenging boss battles), bosses can be shot anywhere (ditto), and the castle doors aren’t as spread out, making memorizing the layout a cinch. BUT, activating the castle doors is borderline broken on the Game Boy. I had to press UP multiple times more than once to actually get myself to go through a door. Sometimes it took me so long that I triggered the lightning storm and had to move out the way to dodge the bolts flying at me several times in a row before it finally let me in. I just went back and checked it to see what the hell happened, and I take it you have to be dead center on a door. I honestly wonder if it’s a single pixel wide. See this door?
In the following screenshots, pressing UP could not, did not, and would not open the f*cking door.
And I actually think the gates are worse. Here’s the gate:
In the following screenshots, pressing UP could not, did not, and would not open the f*cking gate.
That wasn’t a rare occurrence. It was like that from the start of the game until the finish and it’s so far beyond irrational that I wanted to pull my hair out. By the way, that wasn’t the deal breaker, nor was the cramped screen. The deal breaker was the Game Boy version of Milon’s Secret Castle suffers from slowdown constantly, even when there’s hardly anything on screen. By 1993, I feel a developer of the caliber of Hudson Soft should have been able to do better than this. Maybe for 1993, it was cool to have a close approximation of a 1986 NES game in portable form, but it’s not 1993 anymore and there’s no reason to play this today. It’s certainly not a good version of Milon’s Secret Castle. It feels like the whole game could crash at any moment. The “improvements” aren’t so much “improvements” as they’re the easy mode of the NES game, but their gains are negated many times over by the problematic mechanics. Game Boy Verdict: NO! But this review is not over.
SPLIT DECISION: NES VERSION
This thing looks like the cartoon villain of a breath mint commercial. Or a wet wipes commercial. By the way, Milon has a timing issue with bosses. Some are practically fought back-to-back, and it feels jarring when that happens. I look at boss fights as a game’s metronome. They set a tempo. Milon’s metronome needs its batteries changed.
I made a good faith effort of beating Milon without a guide, and I did figure out a lot of it on my own. Like I figured out that, once you have the right item, there’s hidden doors in the overworld that you smash through with the right item. But, that came after a part I got stuck on. There’s pushable blocks in the rooms, only they don’t push right away. You have to walk up against them for longer than you would expect to activate the move, and I needed the guide to tell me that. I also needed the guide to explain the items before I bought them. Maybe the instruction books had this information, but I absolutely did need an assist playing Milon.
The climax was confusing as all hell. Maybe if I had spent a week trying to work this game out, I could have solved it on my own without a strategy guide. But it’s not so good that I want to put that kind of time investment into it.
With that said, I have zero objections to using strategy guides, and StrategyWiki has a highly detailed one for this game. Very nice. Plus, Milon isn’t so abstract that I needed it from start to finish. Actually, the climax of the game kind of threw me off. Because the fourth and final floor I finished in maybe two minutes, if that. I really wondered if I’d gotten the “correct” ending because it seemed too easy after everything that came before it. Well, it turns out that the ending is based on blind RNG luck. There’s only one door to enter on the fourth floor, and it brings you to a room that’s one color, and at the top of that room is a boss. Only, there’s a 75% chance it won’t actually be the final boss. It turns out there’s four rooms that are mostly identical except what color they are. You enter them by going left and right in the starting room, but I didn’t get a chance to do that because, on my first AND second times beating the game, the yellow room was the correct room.
It’s a dumb way to end the game. Stop and think about it: since there’s no way to logic-out which is the correct color room, ANYONE is just going to systematically clear out each room before moving onto the next. All this “twist” does is randomly decide how many times you have to do that before it counts. In the one and only time I beat the Game Boy version, it was the third room, and it was boring after the first room. So, Milon’s Secret Castle doesn’t stick the landing on a satisfying ending, but what led up to it wasn’t a bad game, actually. Okay, so there’s a lot of head-shaking dumb choices. One of the items is the feather. What does that do? See this elevator:
I didn’t get the best screenshots. I guess I didn’t realize how engrossed in the gameplay I was. That probably says more about how much I enjoyed Milon than the review does.
The feather allows you to stand on it. Otherwise, you clip through it. There’s a hidden shop at the top of the elevator shaft that contains the upgrade to your weapon. By the way, that is literally the only elevator in the entire game. But, like, getting the weapon upgrade makes it worth it, right? Well, sure. Except, you know, you don’t actually need to be on the elevator to enter the shop. A well placed jump from either side works just as well. Unlike the overworld, you don’t have to hold “up” to enter a door in the rooms. It’s automatically done when your sprite hits the right spot on the door. They needed to come up with something better for the feather, which is a relatively expensive item. Maybe make it spawn the door itself?
The green thing in this pic is the boxing glove, which cuts your sprite size in half. But, entering a shop in the level undoes its effect. There’s tons of trap doors in Milon’s Secret Castle that were clearly placed where they were to prevent players from soft locking.
Milon has even more problems that would be deal breakers in most games. The combat is just not that good, in my opinion. Hell I’d even go so far as to say that element is well below-average. Your bubbles can be aimed high or low, but they never feel like they pack a punch. Enemies can be cheap, but even when they’re not, they don’t have memorable design or complex attack patterns except a single fireball that’s indestructible unless you possess a specific item, and even after you do it takes sixteen hits to kill and doesn’t pay off. It feels like something that was meant to be important, only the important part was left on the drawing board. Worst of all is that the bosses are not fun. Okay, maybe the first is, but since they’re all kind of samey, that wears off since they all have, more or less, the same attack patterns. The controls are a little stiff, especially the jumping before you get the power-ups that fix it. This is a fairly early NES game, and the developmental learning curve is plainly visible.
This maze is a one-off type of level that was the only “stage” I felt was no good.
But Milon’s Secret Castle never feels like a game that you would play for combat anyway. For all badly designed mechanics, the exploration and startlingly well-done level design make it all work. Seriously, this is a 1986 NES game. Having every level feel unique didn’t happen all that much back then. Even Super Mario Bros. didn’t pull THAT off. But, because such care was taken to make each room feel different, Milon aged better as a fantasy experience than most games. A lot better, in fact. Hudson didn’t come out of Adventure Island: The Definitive Review looking amazing, and a lot of their early NES games were rougher than sandpaper. Milon’s is just as rough as any other game from this stage of the NES’ existence. But Milon’s Secret Castle makes it clear: someone at Hudson Soft knew what they were doing. NES Verdict: YES!
“I didn’t know that was a Zelda game!” One of the kids. I laughed.
Kid Icarus: Of Myths and Monsters
Kid Icarus
Super Mario World
WarioWare, Inc.: Mega Microgames!
And the next might look like this:
Super Mario Advance 4: Super Mario Bros. 3
Super Mario Advance
All Night Nippon: Super Mario Bros.
Yume Kōjō: Doki Doki Panic
Super Mario Bros. 2
Super Mario Bros. Deluxe
Milon’s Secret Castle
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